okay so three men are in a plane ( this is the type of plane you can open the windows) so the stewardess goes up to the first man he asks for a gun she agrees but hes gotta throw it out the window he confused but he does it anyways the stewardess goes to the second man he asks for a beer she agrees but he has to throw it out the window hes confused but he does it anyways the stewardess walks up the the third man he asks for a pack of C4 she agrees but hes gotta throw it out the window without hesitation he gets it and throws it out the window. so they land and the first man sees a women crieing i was walking down the street and got hit in the head by a gun and arested for being armed the second man sees a hobo cheering loudly hes says he was sleeping in the ally and it started raining budlight the third man shes a women hysterically laughing she says i was going to work and spilled my coffe then my house blew up!

What's black and shouldn't have the right to vote? Ants

What did the one midget say to the other midget? We r both small

A construction worker walks into a bar. He says "Ow! That hurt!" And walked in the opposite direction to the manager to complaint about the obvious health code violations of this site.

Why did the plane crash? Because the engine wasnt working.

Roses are red They can be white too Violets are not blue They are violet

Why was Jimmy sad? Because he has a frog stapled to his forehead

what did the robot say to the centipede? "Stop being a centipede!" It's funny because the robot doesn't have any arms.

What do a Nazi and a Democrat have in common? They are both members of a highly supported political faction.

What did the piano say to the ice cube? Dude, get back in the freezer or you are going to melt!

Why are black people afraid of lawn mowers? Because whenever you start it, it says run nigga nigga.

How many Jews can you fit into a car? Depending on the size of the car, you should be able to safely fit somewhere between 2 and 8.

An alien spacecraft picks up human transmissions from Earth. They continue on in silence and disgust.

Wanna hear a riddle? Womens rights

Roses are red, violets are blue, your face belong in the zoo, don't worry I get there too, not in the cage, just visiting you :)

How do you tell a clown his fly is open? Say sir your fly is open. Then beat him with a pipe until you cant tell what used to be his face.

What's worse than crying over spilt milk? The Holocaust.

Q: Why did the little boy fall off the swing? A: Because he was hit by a bus, and then was raped violently. He is currently undergoing psychotherapy.

Have you seen Stevie Wonder's wife? No. Oh don't worry then.

Why was Timmy sad? While helping his dad hang Christmas light, he got tangled up in them and fell down. While falling he grabbed a wire, which caused a spark. This spark lit the house on fire. Since he broke most of the bones in his body from falling he could not run away. The house proceeded to collapse an poor Timmy seriously injuring and hideously disfiguring him. By the time the ambulance got there, Timmy was the only survivor for his parents died of smoke inhalation. Since he had no other living relatives he was forced to live in an orphanage for the rest of his childhood. That is why Timmy is sad.

Why was 6 afraid of 7 ? Because 6 was registered as a sex offender

Knock Knock. Who's there? Knock knock. I've got a gun. Knock kn [*BANG!*] [L]

How did Sarah Offet win? He had no arms. Knock, knock? Whose there? Not Sarah Offet

Why was the chair spinning Cause it wants to

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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