A man walks into a bar. He orders a Guinness.

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What's big, black, and impossible to swallow? A parking lot. Among many other things.

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Whats worse than a dead baby? Two dead babys.

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A horse walks into a bar, and the bartender asks: "why the long face?" The horse replies: "my wife has terminal cancer."

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What do you get when a black man crosses a white man on the street? A black man and a white man on the street..

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how do you prevent a chicken from contracting aids?? you make him a little chicken condom.

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What did Marsha say when she ate the apple pie? Nothing. It would be rude for her to talk with her mouth full.

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A man was about to be assassinated. The assassin said "do you have any last wishes? The man said he wished that a meteor would fly down and kill the assassin. A meteor actually did come down but that was predicted years back. The meteor fell on the assassin and killed him, the man, and any living thing aboveground on Earth.

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Q: What do you call 10 babies at the bottom of the ocean? A: Dead

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What did the cracker say to the cheese? You're so cheesy.

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Tony Soprano walks into a diner

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Rebecca Black. That's it. That's the joke.

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whats worse than 10 dead babies in a bucket 5 are alive and eating the others

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Why did the black man cross the road? He was going to meet up with his friend who happened to be Irish.

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What's the difference between an iPhone and a Samsung Galaxy? Google it, there are many differences.

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How does micheal Jackson know when it's bed time? When the big hand touches the little hand.

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A black man, a jew and a muslim walk into a bar. ... I forgot what happens next, so let's just say they have a good time and get back home safely.

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Q. What do you call a man with a shovel in his head? A. An ambulance due to the fact that he has a rather serious head wound.

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blargen fa-diddle nachen!

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There is a mom a dad and a son, they walk into the museum and the dad is in the bathroom.

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What's brown and sticky A stick

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Is this the Krusty Krab? Nope, Chuck Testa.

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Knock knock Who's there? Jehovah's Witness

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Why did the man drive a van? So he could keep the stuff he stole.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops