Why did the fat man get thrown out of an all you can eat buffet? He molested a waitress

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A black man is trapped inside a bottle, how does he get out? He doesn't it is simply impossible for a human to get trapped inside a bottle.

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What did the lawyer say to the other lawyer? We're both lawyers.

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What starts with P and ends with ORN? Popcorn! What starts with F and ends with UCK? Firetruck! What starts with S and ends with EX? Spandex!

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How do you discover a gay snowman? If the carrot is in the ass.

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Wanna hear a joke? Women Voteing. -Austin Conradt

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What is the difference?

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What did Billy say to Jesus when he died? Nothing he went to hell. -Austin Conradt

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What's funnier than ten dead babies nailed to one tree? Nothing, infant mortality is not a laughing matter.

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Why couldn't the black man get out of jail? He couldn't post his bond.

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A man asked Alexander the Great if he was gay, yet Alexander the Great was not offended. Why? Because "gay" has a rather different connotation than in the modern world than it did in earlier time periods where it meant "happy". Also, Macedonians, Alexander the Great's native people, did not speak English so he would not understand the question. Also Alexander the Great was gay in the sense that he was actually a homosexual.

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Why did a mass amount of people move to Florida? They came to murder their children and get away with it.

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What did the jewish man say to the Irish guy at the bar? Are you Irish?

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what did the rabbi say to the priest? jesus christ, your breath stinks.

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P1: why did the chicken cross the road? P2: to get to the other side. P1: Knock! Knock! P2: whos there? P1: THE CHICKEN!

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What's the difference between a clever trick and a computer programmer? A clever trick throws you for a loop, and a computer programmer throws you a for loop.

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what did the farmer say when he lost his tractor? wheres my tractor

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What has two legs, but can't walk? Half a dog.

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Why did the girl fall out of the swing? She was dead.

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What is a black person's favorite color? There are many different colors and it would be unrealistic to believe that all the people of a single race would choose the same one as their favorite.

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What does a penguins wear on it's feet? Nothing penguins are incapable of wearing foot wear, also they do not have feet they are called 'flippers'.

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What did the fat man say to the other far man Hey your fat

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Your mom is so black, i shot a bullet at her. It came back and said i need a flashlight.

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What do you call a person with no arms or legs? I don't know, that's why I asked you.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops