Roses are red Violets are blue I have alzheimer's Roses are red Violets are blue I have alzheimer's

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Why is Stevie Wonder always smiling? Because he's usually in a good mood.

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Why was little Jimmy sad? Because his mum died.

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What's sad about the Holocaust? Lots of men, women, children were brutally murdered in horrible ways.

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A plane carrying an Englishman, an Irishman, and a Scotsman is destined to crash unless some weight is lost. First they drop the spare engine, but there is still too much weight. Then they drop the luggage, but still there is too much weight. All three men then jump out. The plane crashes anyway.

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don't do anything i wouldn't do first

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Knock knock! Who's there? A doorbell-salesman

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What shoes keep dogs quiet? Hush puppies.

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Why did the black man take the watermelon? Because he bought it, and watermelons are delicious.

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What do you call someone who thinks they're funny but in reality isn't? Adam chapali Knock knock Who's there? NOT adam chapali

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Jack be nimble. Jack be quick. But Jack still couldn't out run that bullet.

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A man wearing a 'What Would Jesus Do' bracelet and a livestrong bracelet goes up to a blind kid and rubs his eyes and the kid can see. The kid was was not used to the bright lights and wandered into traffic, was hit by a car and killed instantly.

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an alien is walking down the street he can't breathe our air and quickly suffocates and dies

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Why did labour not win the election in 2010? Because they are clearly shit.

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Chuck Norris shaves with his fists. That's why he still has a beard.

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What's worse than Bogans? Boat people.

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there was once a time before tht time when there wasnt bonerss there were erectionss CC

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A: Rock! B:Paper! C: Siccorz! D: Shoot! D: Jimmy, you alright buddy? I didn't mean for that bullet to hit you man..

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roses are red violet is blue why rik go to the hospital ? cause he eat glue.

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Roses are niggas Violets are niggas I'm lil Wayne niggas rhymes with niggas

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whaT DID HEVEN SAY TO THE FRIDGE hAVE YOU GOT A COLD

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Why was the black man unemployed and in debt? Because current socio-economic realities and systematic racial discrimination place him at a disadvantage in terms of education and employment. Indeed, it is statistically probable that he was raised below the poverty-line, greatly limiting his opportunities from a young age.

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What's the difference between a police officer and a green dinosaur? They both aren't cabbages.

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Excuse me. Oh, would you mind hitting the 15th floor button for me? Thanks.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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