Two great white sharks are swimming in the ocean together, one turns to the other to speak, but doesn't because sharks can't talk.

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Why did the fat man get thrown out of an all you can eat buffet? He molested a waitress

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Q: Why did the boy fall off his bicycle? A: Because someone threw a fridge at him.

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NEVER

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What do you call a bird that can't fly? an ostrich

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Why couldn't the man sleep? Because he was a wax model in a museum, and as we all know wax models are inanimate objects thus incapable of consciousness and therefore incapable of unconsciousness as well. Many other inanimate objects are caught up in similar problems relating to their incapability to do anything.

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yo mama so fat she had to eat healthy food and exercise daily

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an irishman walks past a bar a.w. j.p.

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What did the farmer say to the other farmer? We are both farmers.

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What was going through the man's head on the 51st floor when the first plane hit? The 52nd floor.

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what is behind your butt? DEEZ NUTS

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Last year my wife ran away with my best friend. I really miss him.

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Roses are Black Violets are black I am colorblind, are you to?

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Why doesnt your dad like barrack Obama? because your dad is straight, hes not into men

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knock knock? come in

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Why did the boy jump off a cliff Because he was gay and committed suicide

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Why did the chicken cross the road? Because the sidewalk he was on does not.

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Jesus walks into a hotel, slams four nails down on the counter, and says, "Put me up for the night!" The concierge looks at him and says, "You're not Jesus. Jesus was brutally murdered approximately 1,970 years ago. And although I may not be a believer, his teachings have brought comfort and solace to millions of people around the world. Nor do we accept nails as payment. Please remove yourself from the premises or I will call security."

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What do you call a fat guy running on the street? Nothing because you should respect his effort trying to improve his health.

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Bläeghen-Fassybìll-No?cheb!

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Why was the camel sad he wasnt, camels dont have feelings

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What's the difference between a pelican? 28, because elephants have 4 legs.

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Chuck Norris has normal human strength.

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How do you make a baby crawl in circles? Nail its hand to the floor. How do you make a baby stop crawling? Nail the other one to the floor.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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