Your mom is so old, that when somebody told her to act her age, she died.

A midget, a nun, and a kangaroo walk into a bar, and the bartender says, "What is this? Some kind of joke?"

What starts with F and ends in UCK? The F word but im not allowed to say it.

how many licks does it take to get to the center of a tootsie pop? It depends on a variety of factors such as the size of your mouth, the amount of saliva, etc.

What do you call a black pilot? A PILOT

Knock Knock. Come in.

Q: What's black and hangs from a tree? A: A tire swing.

What's funnier than a dead baby? A dead baby dressed as a clown.

Knock Knock Who's there? Charles Grodin. Charles Grodin who? Exactly.

A man walks into a bar falls into the street and gets run over. It was very tragic

This guy went to the store because he needed potatoes. So he asked the clerk where the potatoes were at and she said "Isle fiveeeeeee!" So he went there and there were no potatoes ! hahahahahahahhahahahahahahahahahhahahhahahhahahahahahahahahhahahahahahhahahahahahahahhahahahahahhahahajhahahahahhahahhahahhahahahahahahhaahhahahahahahahahahhahahahahahahahahahahahahahahhahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahhahahahahhahahhahahahahhaahhahahahahahahahahahhahaahhahahahahahahaahhahahahahahhahahahahahahahahhahahahahahahhahahahahahahahahahahahhahahahahahahahahahhahahahahahahhahahahahahahahahahahahhaahhahaahahahahahhhhahha

Why is the baby not crying? Because it died of herpes. JUST KIDDING! Babies can't get herpes.

1. Go to the WRITE YOUR OWN! section on this website. 2. Check the box on "I have read and agreed to the Terms of Service." 3. The Submit button should become available for clicking. 4. Now uncheck the box. 5. Thumbs up if the Submit button is still available. -BG_Shank_A

One day, a mother was talking with her three daughters. "Mommy," the first one asked, "Why did you name me Daisy?" "Because when we took you home, a daisy petal fell on your head." "Mommy," the second one said, "Why did you name me Rose?" "Because when we took you home, a rose petal fell on your head." "MMMMBBBWWAAAAAAAAAGGGGGHHHHH!" the third daughter cried. She was born with severe cognitive damage and is incapable of coherent speech.

When Zeddie LIttle takes an Unflattering picture, millions of Internet people ask him why he looks Wierd in it. He says, "well, I was having a really tough day that day- my grandpa had just died- and I didn't feel like caring about what I looked like." Either way, he essentially fades into the darkness as the new fad takes over.

Knock, knock! Who's there? Mary Mary who? Mary Smith.

A man walks into a bar, and the bartender asks "What'll you have?" The man replies "Surprise me." The bartender proceeds to mix cyanide with the mans drink and loses his bartending license and goes to prison for murdering a customer.

Who more attractive then you? No one your ugly as pooh.

What's the difference between an elevator and a Mexican? An elevator helps society

What did the grape say when the elephant sat on it? Nothing, scientific research has shown over thousands of years that grapes cannot talk.

Roses are bald Violets are bald You are bald I think you have cancer.

yo momma is so ugly, she attempted to get plastic surgery and then died from the amount of blood loss she got when the surgeons realized her head was filled with tumors and they failed to extract them.

Did you hear about the guy who fed his dog his baby? No Oh

During a boxing match, a white man faces an Asian. The Asian loses. Next the white man faces a Mexican. The Mexican also loses. Now the white man faces a black man. "Aw screw it!"

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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