What happens when you give a Parrot a pack of cigarettes? Animal Rights Activists get upset and condemn your actions.

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Why did the boy drop his lolypop Because it tasted bad

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moonshine most none americans think its just when the moon shines we have another story

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Why did the jew put a parking meter on his roof.? ....So santa would have to pay to park.

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How do you make an elephant float? Who cares?

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Roses are red Violets are blue i suck at poems nice titz

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Roses are Red Violets are blue This joke isn't funny And neither are you!

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What is the hardest thing about eating a vegetable? the wheelchair

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How come anti jokes r funny

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what is the name of the book that helen keller wrote LADIUFgSLDGFhalkjgfvcgh

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What did the bank clerk say to the robber when he demanded all the money in the drawer? "Okay."

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a blonde, brunette and a red head are all goin to jump off a bridge and turn into something. the brunette jumps and says fish, and she turns into a fish. the red head says eagle and becomes an eagle. the blonde gets a running start, but then trips on the way off and she says shit and turns into a piece of shit.

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how do yopu punish helen keller? Ground her, just like you would with any other child.

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How do you get a black guy down from your tree? You can't, because there aint any.

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How many babies could a cannibal eat? 132/267 of a baby

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What is worse then dying of testicular cancer? Living of testicular cancer and having one amputated?

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What did the lactose intolerant boy say when he accidentally drank some milk? Nothing, he went into anaphylactic shock and couldn't breathe.

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Why did Sally fall off her bike? Because sally has no arms. Knock knock Who's there? Not Sally.

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Why did Mary fall off the swings? Because she had no arms. Knock Knock, Whos there, Not Mary

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what did the lamp say to the woman Nothing, a lamp is a plastic glass and metal inaminate object therfore it can not speak

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What can't catch or throw? A Quadriplegic

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Q: 1 out of every 44 presidents can dunk, who is it? A: How the hell am i suppost to know

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How did the black man fall of the cliff? He was gazing over and realized he had Prostate cancer and fell off the cliif.

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How long does it take jimmy hoffa to screw in a light bulb? A: Jimmy Hoffa is dead and incapable of screwing in a light bulb, however if you change the tense of the question to "how long WOULD Jimmy Hoffa HAVE TAKEN to screw in a light bulb" then the approximate answer would be around 1 1/2 minutes if Mr Hoffa had proper dexterity an motor control that was comparable to the average human.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops