how do you get a dog to stop barking? you hit it with a stick.

If you place a dog next to a cow, they're not the same size

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What is Blue, Pink, and Green, and sometimes sparkles when wet? Grass. I lied about the Blue and Pink to throw you off...because I can.

What did the boy with AIDS, polio, one eye and one arm get for Christmas? Cancer.

a black man, a jew, a mexican and an irish man walked into a bar and the bartender says: This is joke right??

How do you stop a black person from drowning?.. Take your foot off his head

Knock Knock -Who's there? No one -Ok

An Anthony eats a juicy pickle.

Roses are red, Violets are blue, Go fuck yourself.

So this squirrel is walking across the road when a HUGE truck comes and smashes him beneath the tire.

why was the boy sad He was just abused by his parents and had aids

(Knock knock) A:who is it? B:its the police open up where coming in B:I SAID OPEN THE BLOODY DOOR A:(SHIT)

What's the difference between Neal Armstrong and Michael Jackson? Neal Armstrong was the first man to WALK on the MOON, while Michael Jackson enjoyed touching young boys.

Write Your Own Why did the chicken cross the road? To get to the other side Enter the following: Which is bigger the moon or the elephant? Your Answer: The elephant [] I have read and agree to the Terms of Service ((((Submit)))) [1 error prohibited this post from being saved] ---There were problems with the following field -> Wrong answer

Roes are red, Violets are blue, This poem doesn't rhyme, You're entire family has died. The plane that they were on went down due to a flock of geese getting sucked into the engine. They were visiting you for your twenty fifth birthday and wanted to surprise you. there were no survivors.

What is red and smells like brown feces? Bloody feces

Why did the toilet paper roll? Because it isn't rock!

Hey what did you do on The weekend??? I got hit by a bus!

A: Rock! B:Paper! C: Siccorz! D: Shoot! D: Jimmy, you alright buddy? I didn't mean for that bullet to hit you man..

Q: Why didn't Dwight D. Eisenhower play with the silly putty? A: Because he's dead.

Your mums so tall, she's above the average height of women for her age.

I guy goes into a coffee shop and says I'll have a coffee and a danish. The clerk says we're all out of danish. The guy says I'll just have the danish then.

whats worse then a child with a dead mom? the baby is still inside.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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