Knock knock. Come in. You're under arrest for second degree murder.

What's the difference between being gay and being homosexual? Nothing really. The two words are synonyms so they can be used interchangeably.

Banana

Q: why did the plane crash? A: because jack daniels equals 7

Q:Why did the black man break into the KFC? A: Due to being recently fired from his job, he is not earning any income. The lack of money to support his family of 5 drove him to such a desperate state that he found breaking into restaurant the only way to provide for his loved ones.

Three men are in prison and comparing crimes. The first says that he got three years and he never robbed that store. The second says he served six years and he never hit that lady. The third said he got life, and he killed every child in that orphanage.

When is the best time to wear a striped sweater? All the time

What do you call cheese that isn't yours? Someone else's cheese.

What did Helen Keller say to the priest? Nothing, she didn't know he was there.

why did the girl fell off the hammock? because she didn't have arms and why didn't she got up? 'cause she had no legs and why didn't anyone helped her? 'cause she had no friends and why did she die? 'cause she fell into a puddle facing down

A woman had a dream. She followed this dream and completed all the goals she had set in life and was excessively happy. Then she woke up and her original suspicions were confirmed...it was a dream.

What is big, black, and hairy? A coconut.

An Englishmen, an Australian, an American and a Chinese man were in a bar they were all friends who were having a drink together.

Knock Knock Who's there? Not Sally!

Why couldn't little Billy jump? He was dead.

Why did the straight man turn gay? He didn't. He was always gay but had to hide this from his family and friends because of an overwhelming sense of homophobia in his community.

What do you get when you cross an alligator and a kangaroo? Nothing. An alligator is a reptile and a kangaroo is a mammal, therefore it is impossible for them to breed.

Communism is very bad........well........look at China's economy

Why are elephants ears sooo big? The big ears are to help the elephants stay cool. Elephants don't sweat, so they have a hard time dissipating excess heat (keeping cool). Their large ears contain many blood vessels that allow heat to escape into the air. When you see elephants they are usually moving their ears back and forth. This fanning helps to dissipate more heat than if their ears remained still. The enormous ears of elephants act as cooling devices. The gigantic earflaps (which can measure up to 2 square metres (21.5 square feet) are equipped with an intricate web of blood vessels. When the animal flaps its ears, the blood temperature lowers by as much as 5 degrees Celsius (9 degrees Fahrenheit). To keep cool

Knock knock Who's There? My name is Jeff

tom hall

Roses are Red, Violets are Blue, I am homeless, Can I have some food?

why so serious? because your too serious.

A horse walks into a bar. The barman says "Sorry, we don't allow horses in here." The horse then leaves.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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