Yo mama's so fat, we are all extremely concerned for her health.

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What does a blind, deaf, parapalegic baby get for christmas? Cancer.

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A priest and a rabbi walk into a bar. They order drinks and have a conversation and eventually they leave.

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How many Jews did Hitler kill during the Holocaust? Too many.

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What's the difference between being gay and being homosexual? Nothing really. The two words are synonyms so they can be used interchangeably.

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Why couldn't little Billy jump? He was dead.

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What do you call a black man carrying a bag full of drugs? A police officer who has just confiscated the bag from a drug dealer and is on his way to send the bag off to be destroyed.

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Why are elephants ears sooo big? The big ears are to help the elephants stay cool. Elephants don't sweat, so they have a hard time dissipating excess heat (keeping cool). Their large ears contain many blood vessels that allow heat to escape into the air. When you see elephants they are usually moving their ears back and forth. This fanning helps to dissipate more heat than if their ears remained still. The enormous ears of elephants act as cooling devices. The gigantic earflaps (which can measure up to 2 square metres (21.5 square feet) are equipped with an intricate web of blood vessels. When the animal flaps its ears, the blood temperature lowers by as much as 5 degrees Celsius (9 degrees Fahrenheit). To keep cool

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When is the best time to wear a striped sweater? All the time

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why so serious? because your too serious.

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Knock knock. Come in. You're under arrest for second degree murder.

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A tiger walks into a bar and orders a drink. The bartender gets him a drink because he would rather not get vigorously consumed by a mighty beast.

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He is so gay that he likes penis.

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why did the girl fell off the hammock? because she didn't have arms and why didn't she got up? 'cause she had no legs and why didn't anyone helped her? 'cause she had no friends and why did she die? 'cause she fell into a puddle facing down

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What do you get when you cross an alligator and a kangaroo? Nothing. An alligator is a reptile and a kangaroo is a mammal, therefore it is impossible for them to breed.

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Why are black people so stupid an lazy? They aren't. This is a negative social stigma and if you believe it you are a racist.

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What did the shark say to the elephant? Nothing, they live in different habitats

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How many babies can fit inside a trash can? Seven.

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Three men are walking and one falls over, he then gets up and continues walking.

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what did the asian father say to his son after seeing he got a B- in math? "There's small room for improvement but overall you did a great job son."

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A penguin bikes to a bakery, the baker asks him "what kind of bread do you want?" Penguin replies "it doesn't matter, im biking"

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Roses are Red, Violets are Blue, I am homeless, Can I have some food?

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What did Helen Keller say to the priest? Nothing, she didn't know he was there.

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Knock Knock Who's there? Not Sally!

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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