Why does your mom moan and scream at night? She had a rough childhood, filled with all types of despair and disappointment.

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How do you tie your shoes underwater? In a submarine

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Roses are red, Violet are blue, This is Sparta, I am a chair

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why did the chicken cross the road? who knows, we cannot read an animals (or a human for that matter) mind. Perhaps, though unlikely as he's a chicken, he saw a friend across the road or a child who wants to stroke him. Perhaps he is trying to escape being used as a circus act or being cooked for a supermarket. We cannot complain if the chicken wishes for a better life. Anyway, we shall never know why the chicken decided to cross the road, and never will, as it is dead after being hit by a car.

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Q: Why was the blonde so dumb? A: Because she wasn't properly educated.

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AND

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What do you call a fish with no eye? A fsh

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Why don't chickens where pants? Cause they're animals,duh.

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What's worse than going to boot camp? - going to concentration camp.

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Q; What smells like chicken, tastes like turkey and looks like duck? A; Nothing...dumbass.

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Why was 6 afraid of 7? 7 was a skank.

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Q: How do you get a one armed Pollock out of a tree? A: Call the fire department.

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Why is the ANTIJOKE symbol 2 mask faces crying? Because some people don't know how to write a good joke.

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Two guys walk into a bar, a spanish guy and a black guy. They get some drinks, call a taxi to arrive home safe. And kiss their wives and kids goodnight. They go to bed early after reading a wallstreet journal. And wake up early so they can both go to their jobs as college professors. To white kids.

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What did the boy with no arms get for Christmas? Gloves.

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How do you make a bird drop a worm? Wring it's neck. P.S: If that anti-joke didn't persuade you to vote thumbs up for this post, then perhaps these delightful lyrics will convince you otherwise. I see them staring back at me They know my name The faces in the sky are looking for something more My friends have paper smiles and laugh at me in all my trials Their eyes are everywhere and see everything what do They need me And I need them See me And I see them Within The lines they've been burned in my mind It all ends so violently I know My sweet pareidolia It all ends so painfully and slow My pareidolia My friends have hollow eyes They're made of shapes and curvy lines Their eyes are everywhere and see everything what do They need me And I need them See me And I see them Within The lines they've been burned in my mind It all ends so violently I know My sweet pareidolia It all ends so painfully and slow [. From: http://www.elyrics.net/read/e/elena-siegman-lyrics/pareidolia-lyrics.html .] My pareidolia The loneliness is only missed when I am alone O yeah I might try to find my light tonight Hide my sight from eyes I try to fight My nine eyes of light die by the blight Ride white knight unite my plight tonight They're inside me They're inside me I'm inside out I'm inside out They're all around Within without Within without They're inside I'm outisde They're all around They're all around They're inside me I'm inside out They're all around Within without It all ends so violently I know My sweet pareidolia It all ends so painfully and slow My pareidolia la lalala lalala lalala lala

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What did Batman say to Robin before getting into the Batmobile? Robin, get in the Batmobile.

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Why did the boy drop his ice cream? He wanted to catch the frisbee that was thrown to him.

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Q: what happens to the black guy that walks into the bar. A: He walk in ,gets a drink, and leaves

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What did the handicapped boy say to his mother? Nothing, his severe mental retardation impaired his ability to learn the English language.

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What time is it when an elephant sits on your watch? About 3:26 PM Eastern Standard Time.

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Three men sat at a pub, it reminded them of this joke they once heard

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A deer walked into a hunter's bar... and was shot.

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what is the difference between a cow?? there is no difference, you can't make a comparison between different object when there is only one object beïng named.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

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The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

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