What do you call a big group of Chinese people on Mars? An extraordinary feat for the Chinese space program and a historic day in human history, where a particular country has set up the first human colony on another planet and we have proven to ourselves that our race is capable of interplanetary travel and can accomplish anything if we set our minds to it.

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why doesnt john lipka have a job? because the unemployment rate is high these days.

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What did the spider say to the lobster? Nothing, they are enemies and don't live in the same habitat.

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What did the doctor say to the obese person? You have diabetes.

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KANE TUCKER HAS A CHODE THE SIZE OF HIS FINGER NAIL

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what's worse than falling and scraping your knee? living within a 10 mile radius of a Japanese nuclear reactor

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What did the mute man say to his mother? Seeing as mute men can't talk, we'll never know

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What's the worst part about eating a vegetable? Putting her back in the wheel chair.

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why did the man sell the car and bought worse one? it' s his hoby to restore cars

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Why did the road cross the chicken? Well, according to Einstein's Theory of Special Relativity, if you and the chicken were to cross the road simultaneously, your perspective, relative to the chicken, would remain unchanged. Therefore, the road would appear to move underneath the chicken, which would seem to be performing some style of polka dance.

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An old lady at an atm told me to check her balance So i pushed her over

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Why did the man eat the turnip greens? Because he was morbidly obese, and needed to maintain a proper diet.

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A homeless guy walked up to me and said "Any change?", to which I replied, "Nope, your still homeless". We laughed and laughed. The he stabbed me.

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Q:What did Batman say to Robin just before they got into the Batmobile? A:"Robin get in the Batmobile"

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What do you call a Black White supremisist? Well you see the Black man was blind and thought he was a racists redneck. He then contracted cancer.

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What's worse than aids? Being a virgin.

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jamie and danel texta like to make love to each other using a gerbal as a toy when they make love they get a african covered in jelly to help them.

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Can you get me a stapler,but make sure it has staples or else I won't be able to staple anything

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Women, "Did just pinch my ass!?" Man, "Yes." Women, "Oh, alright then."

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Why did the airplane crash? Because the pilot was a loaf of bread

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What's faster, a train or a bike? A horse because a cow gives milk

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When the world ends what would be the death toll It would be unknown since every one would be around to calculate it

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Text this number just cuz 16305208722

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What did the Irishman say to the German? "Sorry, do you have the time?"

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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