How dou you find the population of mexico? Take a census....... By throwing a dime in the street!

A man walks into a bar with an octopus. He tells the bartender that his octopus can play any instrument. The bartender gives the octopus bag pipes. The octopus fiddles with the bag pipes but can't seem to play them. The man gives the bag pipes back to the bartender and leaves with his octopus. He is quite embarassed and decided to get bagpipe lessons for his octopus.

a pope and a catholic priest walk into a bar... the priest orders... then the pope says to the bartender "I'll have what hes having." so the bartender takes out a small child and says ...."are you sure?"

Why was the emo kid sad? Because he gets raped by his dad every night

What's blck and blue and doesn't like sex? The ten year old in my car.

WHAT DOES A NUMBER DO WHEN IT'S HORNE? MATHDERBATION

An elephant walked into a bar. By bar I mean jungle. Elephants aren't capable of walking into a bar.

Why did the girl fall off the swing? She had no arms.

How much wood can a wood chuck chuck if a wood chuck could chuck wood? The Holocaust

whats the difference between a black guy and a park bench? well a park bench is an inanimate object that people use to sit on and feed the birds at the park. and a black guy is a living being who is looked down upon in society.

[INSERT ANTIJOKE HERE]

What do friends and trees have in common? They will fall over if you hit them repeatedly with an axe.

What is white and can't climb trees? Toothpaste.

A penguin walks into a bakery. The baker asks the penguin: "What kind of bread would you like? Brown or white?". Penguins answers: "Well, it doesn't really matter since I came here by car!".

What did the Cat get for Christmas? Nothing cats don't celebrate Christmas

A: Knock Knock.. B: Who's there? A: John B: John Who? A: Shut the hell up, i'm masturbating.

why was the teenage girl crying? She was molested as a child

What do you call a black man on the moon? An astronaut you racist bastard

Ask me if i'm a tree. Are you a tree? No.

Q: Why did Jesus die for our sins? A: He didn't.

What's the diffence between a pieace of fried chicken and a Jew? A Jew wouldnt scream in a fryer.

I like it it the butt -Tyler James Nehring call me 863-670-1547

Why did the little boy didn't finish his dinner? He died.

Why did the chicken cross the road? Who let the chickens out?!

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...