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What is black and blue and red all over? A woman that just learned a valuable lesson.

Q. Why do some people not like anti-jokes? A. They don't find the humor funny.

A man walks into a bar his alcoholism is tearing his family apart

Knock Knock! But nobody was home and couldn't hear it.

Why did andy fall down Because his friend pushed him over

Jack: Hey, you know what sucks? Jill: Vacuums Jack: Hey, you know what sucks in a metaphorical sense? Jill: Black holes Jack: Hey, you know what just isn't cool? Jill: Lava?

Where did Wendy decide to work for her part time job? TACO BELL

What do you call a blonde person? By her name.

Your moms so stupid she ate all the food in the grocery store

You're Like A Book I Want To Put You Down

When life gives you a pack of Kools, make Kool-Aid.

'Knock Knock' "Who's there?" 'Nobody. Your schizophrenia has become so bad you can barely make it through a normal day without emotionally collapsing. Your social life has dissolved into a world of fear, and your personal relationships have crumbled away before your eyes. Major depression and anxiety are eating you away. You have nothing left.'

How do you make a person who wins the lottery sad? You threaten to kill his family.

What happened to the baby in the microwave. I don't know I was too busy masturbating off to it in my clown suit

Where's my baby??

what's worse than 10 dead babies in one trash can? 1 baby in ten trash cans

Chris Brown walks into a bar. And then is politely asked to leave as the bar owner also happens to be the spokesperson for an anti-domestic violence group.

Why did the monkey fall out of the tree? Because he was Dead.

What did the black guy do in the hood? walked down the street, bought the paper and watched Letterman.

Are you thinking Arby's? No. My grandmother died of tuberculosis and it's troubling me.

What's the difference between Republicans and Democrats? There is a series of boxes which one can choose to check on a ballot, officially registering an individual with a certain party. Available parties include the Green Party, The American Communist Party, The Republican Party, and the Democratic Party among others. Republicans choose to check the Republican box, Democrats choose to check the Democrat box. Also Republicans are closet homosexuals and Democrats are terrorists.

What's the difference between an apple and a baby. An apple is a fruit. A baby is a human being.

What did the little boy want to be when he grew up? A cone

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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