what does a baby sound like in a microwave. i don't know i was masturbating

that wall over there ->

Why did the fat man get thrown out of an all you can eat buffet? He molested a waitress

hat did the fridge say to the oven your hot baby \

How do you make a plumer cry? Kill his family

So my teacher came upto me, and says "At the end of this ruler is a idiot" so I said "Which end?" I got detention.

What did the farmer say after the chicken started talking? Holy shit a talking chicken

What would you call the jetsons if they were black? Niggers

Why did the Salesman leave the leper colony? He had to wish his daughter a happy birthday.

yo mama is so fat that when she stepped on the scale she exclaimed "wow, i'm overweight" she then proceeded to eat a cupcake to mask her pain.

YOU

what is black and hangs from the tree in my back yard? a moldy apple.

Why couldn't Roger become an astronaut? Because Roger's a toaster.

What's the thing that freaks guys out the most? When you're about to have sex with a girl and it turns out she had a penis and it's bigger than yours

what is sadder than lost in a ps4 game ? Your mom's funeral, she died in a horrible accident yesterday

Your mom is soo black , she can go naked to a funeral.

What did the farmer say when he lost his tractor? "I have a gambling problem."

Mike: Hey Dave knock knock Dave: Come in!

Why couldn't the man sleep? Because he was a wax model in a museum, and as we all know wax models are inanimate objects thus incapable of consciousness and therefore incapable of unconsciousness as well. Many other inanimate objects are caught up in similar problems relating to their incapability to do anything.

Why did the koala fall of the tree? Because it was dead. Why did the other koala fall off the tree? It was stapled to the first koala.

what is red and can grow hair water i lied about it growing hair and that it is red

Your momma is so old, she qualifies for multiple financial aid programs provided by the government.

What color is an orange chicken? Fried rice

I got a boner from the waitress touching my shoulder, please dislike this

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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