What do you call something round and red that tastes like a tomato and shoots through walls? A Super Tomato. And what do you call a banana that shoots through walls? A banana trying to be a Super Tomato.

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So this blonde walks into a library.

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a duck walks in to a Chinese restaurant and they cut his head off

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What do you call a black woman getting hit in the face? Domestic Violence.

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What can't think, see, hear, taste, or smell? A Headless Cat

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Why did the chicken cross the road? Nobody knows. Chickens aren't capable of knowing why they do things.

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One night a kid heard thunder and got scared. So he went to his parents bed and asked he could sleep with them. His mom said " Sure just don't look under the covers." He said okay and he looked under the covers and said " Daddy, why is your snake in Mommy's garden?"

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Why did the road cross the chicken? Because Einstein said so. According to Einstein's Theory of Special Relativity, if you and the chicken were to cross the road simultaneously, your perspective, relative to the chicken, would remain unchanged. Therefore, the road would appear to move underneath the chicken, which would seem to be performing some style of polka dance.

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Every 60 seconds in Africa. A minute passes.

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How do you stop the neighbors kids jumping your fence and stealing your lemons? Molest them.

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Why did the plane crash? Because the pilot was a loaf of bread. Why did the car crash? Because the driver was a loaf of bread. Why did the boat sink? Because the pirates attacked.

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A father of 4 commits suicide. his kids celebrate shortly after.

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Why did the chicken cross the road? Because the chicken was trying to escape from the sad and depressing environment that surrounded him on the side he thus came from. Alas, he did not know that he would be soon hit by a drunk truck driver, who would also die, in a bright explosion of morbid flames and screams.

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Roses are red Violets are blue Most poems rhyme This one doesn't

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What makes the world go round? Gravity.

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What's the difference between a dead baby and a ferrari? A dead baby causes years of grief and broken families

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What do you call a black man flying a plane? A pilot.

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Two men are waiting for the traffic light to cross the road. One looks at the other and says 'Hello!' The other replies 'Hello!'

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What is the hardest part of a vegtable? The wheel chair 0.o

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theres a fat guy

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What's big, red, and eats rocks? A big, red, rock eater.

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Why did the baby cross the street? It was stapled to the chicken

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How is Stevie Wonder like Ray Charles? They are both talented musicians

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Want to hear a joke? Justin Bieber

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops