What did John say to Paul before they entered the car? "Paul, get in the car."

What did the schoolgirl say to some of the people of Anti-Joke.com? You're sick. Stop talking about the Holocaust.

What is big, red and eats rocks? A big red rock eater

Women deserve equal rights.

Confucius says... The superior man, when resting in safety, does not forget that danger may come. When in a state of security he does not forget the possibility of ruin. When all is orderly, he does not forget that disorder may come. Thus his person is not endangered, and his States and all their clans are preserved.

what is black and green and rainy all over? the democratic republic of congo

Q: What were little Jonathon's grandmas last words before dying of Alzheimer's? A: Who are you?

Holocaust jokes are in bad taste, Anne Frankly I won't have any of it.

Your mother is so fat that when she goes to the movies, she usually orders popcorn and maybe a drink.

Think of a number, add it by 7, subtract it by 2, and multiply it by 4. Now close your eyes, isn't it dark?

"I see." said the blind man to his deaf son.

What does AIDS smell like? AIDS has no smell. AIDS is a diease contracted though sexual contact with another being with the diease. It greatly increases the risk of infections and malignancy. Although AIDS has no smell, in the final stages large sores develope on the surface of the skin. This means you are going to die. Thus, HIV/AIDS has no smell.

What would a gay man do with a jelly doughnut? Thoroughly enjoy its fruity taste.

Wanna hear a joke? no

When I see the Viagra commercial telling you about all the side effects and they say "if you have an erection lasting for more than 4 hours, call a doctor." If I have an erection that lasts that long, I'm not calling a doctor. I'm calling my mom; who I always call when I'm sick.

If a tree falls on a woman and there is no one around to hear it, she was probably lonely.

a lazy boy sleeps 23/24 hours. what does he do in the remaining hour ? he takes a nap

Whats pink and silver and runs into walls? A baby with forks in its eyes. Whats green and silver and sits in a corner? The same baby three weeks later.

I am green. You are blue. Jokes are infinite. This is too.

Can a match box? No, but a tin can.

What did Sally want for Christmas? Nothing, she is Jewish.

Why was the black man picking cotton from the backyard? Because he enjoys gardening as a hobby, and prefers to do it every Sunday, after work.

Why didn't little Timmy see the bus right before it hit him? Because he was blind

What did the Amazonian tribesman say to the European explorer? Nothing, he was focussing on eating him.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

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