How do you get 100 Jews into a Volkswagon? You don't. It's impossible to fit that many people into a car that small.

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What do you call a prostitute with morals? Ironic.

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A scantily dressed woman is standing at an intersection. She is a prostitute.

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Poker face

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KCLTLMBAIMWSSHTCAWGAHW

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If little Timmy buys 80 candy bars and eats 67, how many candy bars does he have left? Diabetes. Timmy has diabetes. So he was disowned.

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What's the difference between 50 dead babies and a three-course meal? One of them can feed me for a day and the other is a three-course meal.

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A man walks into a bar. He was the barman. [L]

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Whats worst than finding half a worm in your apple? Getting rapped by a giant scorpian

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What do you call a black man on the moon? Another successful moon landing by NASA in which the African-American astronaut went on a successful moon walk.

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why did the irishman leave the bar he had to go to his sons birthday party

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There once was a man named bulagala moo moo boom chicka boom. Sometimes, when wipe the toilet tissue breaks and my fingers get all dirty. Good thing I have insurance!

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What did the farmer say when he lost his tractor? Where's my tractor?

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What's living, purple, yellow, and green? Nothing.

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Why did the mushroom go to the party? Cause he was invited.

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What did the three best friends say to eachother? We are all best friends

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I once did __________ (went to Hawaii, drank a whole gallon of beer, etc. ), but then I woke up. Works with anything, and people will laugh.

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What did the cow say to the butcher? At least I'm not a Jew.

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(Mortal Kombat Annihilation) Princess Kitana: "Mother, you're alive" Sindel: "Too bad you, will die" (Troll 2) "They're eating her. And then they're gonna me. Oh my gawwwwwwwwd." (The Room) Johnny: I did not hit her, it's not true! It's bullshitt! I did not hit her! [throws water bottle] Johnny: I did *not*. Oh hi, Mark. Mark: Oh, hey Johnny, what's up?

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What did one cow say to the other? Moo.

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What happens when 4 friends throw an egg into oncoming traffic, they hit a fire hydrant!

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Sharing means caring, Caring is socialism

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how did the guy in the wheelchair cross the road he didnt he got dragged down the street cause his chair was hooked to the bus

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Knock knock Who's there? Dishes Dishes who? Dishes a bad joke

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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