Q: Why are pine trees green? A: Because of the green pigments in the leaves known as chlorophyll which are used to capture sunlight.

Knock Knock Who's there? Mike Mike who? Just kidding, it's Danny. Oh okay, come in.

Why was six afraid of seven? Back when seven was in Vietnam, he sufferd Posttraumatic Stress Disorder (PTSD) and constantly has flash backs and irrational thoughts of six being with the veitnamese alliance and tries to viciously molest six whenever he runs out of anxiety medication.

Where's my baby??

Why did andy fall down Because his friend pushed him over

Where did Wendy decide to work for her part time job? TACO BELL

what's worse than 10 dead babies in one trash can? 1 baby in ten trash cans

You're Like A Book I Want To Put You Down

A man walks into a grab and go restaurant and asks the man if he can stay, the man replies "yes."

What do you call a blonde person? By her name.

Q. Why do some people not like anti-jokes? A. They don't find the humor funny.

A man walks into a bar his alcoholism is tearing his family apart

How do you make a person who wins the lottery sad? You threaten to kill his family.

'Knock Knock' "Who's there?" 'Nobody. Your schizophrenia has become so bad you can barely make it through a normal day without emotionally collapsing. Your social life has dissolved into a world of fear, and your personal relationships have crumbled away before your eyes. Major depression and anxiety are eating you away. You have nothing left.'

What happened to the baby in the microwave. I don't know I was too busy masturbating off to it in my clown suit

What did the black guy do in the hood? walked down the street, bought the paper and watched Letterman.

What is black and blue and red all over? A woman that just learned a valuable lesson.

When life gives you a pack of Kools, make Kool-Aid.

Chris Brown walks into a bar. And then is politely asked to leave as the bar owner also happens to be the spokesperson for an anti-domestic violence group.

Jack: Hey, you know what sucks? Jill: Vacuums Jack: Hey, you know what sucks in a metaphorical sense? Jill: Black holes Jack: Hey, you know what just isn't cool? Jill: Lava?

Knock Knock! But nobody was home and couldn't hear it.

PLEASE DONT READ THIS OR YOU'LL BE DIED IF YOU DON'T POST MESSAGE ON LIKE DIFFERENT VIDEO

Why did the monkey fall out of the tree? Because he was Dead.

Your moms so stupid she ate all the food in the grocery store

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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