Roses are red, Violets are blue, Penis.

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Whats the difference between Justin Bieber and Elton John? They're both gay.

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Your parents shouldn't have met. I was thinking that as I contemplated suicide.

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Mum says therirs ups in life... I have the Downs

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Have you seen Stevie Wonders new house? No neither has he.

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How many electricians does it take to change a lightbulb? No seriously, I don't know because we've only just got electricity in our village.

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Q how do you feel? A with a series of nerve endings, that send signals to my brain

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What's the difference between a black minister and a white priest? Nothing. We are all equal in the eyes of God.

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If Santa's not real, then who pees on the tree every morning?

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roses are red vilits are blue get in the van or i kill you

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What did the farmer say to little susie? I have a gun. Get in the car and dont scream or i will kill you

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What's your favorite Sylvia Plath quote? "Turn on the oven."

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Why arent guys and girls the same? Cause there different

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Coke or Pepsi? Trick question, beer.

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Your mom's so fat that when she stepped on the scale at the doctors office the doctor said " hey i wanted your weight not your phone number"

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What do you call a chair in the middle of the road? A danger to drivers.

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What did the muffin, say to the other muffin? Nothing. Because muffin's are inanimate objects, therefore incapable of speech, or any other sentient ability. They baked quietly until the man who was baking them came to the conclusion they were fit for consumption, devoured them, and went on with his day.

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Do you know what hurts? An abortion.

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No it doesnt..

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Why did the dog bark? Because he wanted to.

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What's worse than getting raped by a duck? Getting raped by two ducks.

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Never go into your parents room with a blacklight.. -Ryan Vallee

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Two muffins are sitting on a counter. One muffin says to the other "hello." The other muffin says "Oh my god a talking muffin!"

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Why did the chicken cross the road? It didn't.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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