Why did the Mexican cross the road? Because he was late for his uncle's funeral, which was taking place in the church across from his apartment.

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A pregnant woman walks into a bar and miscarries.

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Why'd the clown fall out of the tree? it died. Why'd the cat fall out of the tree? it died Why'd the chicken fall out of the tree? it was stapled to the clown

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Whats worse than the Holocaust? reading posts on this website that arent antijokes. Seriously poeople... you cant just say something that random than put something tragic. it has to be funny and tragic.

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what did one elephant say to the other one? nothing silly elepehants dont talk

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Why was the truck driver speeding down the road? To get to his mother's funeral. Why didn't the baby cross the road? Because it didn't have any guts.

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pee

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why did tommy cry?his mother killed his turtle on christmas

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Q: How Do you make a baby be quiet? A: slowly chop it's head off with a blunted axe once it's head is off eat it

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What's more boring than watching grass grow? Watching grass not grow.

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Why did the chicken cross the road? To try to get the antidote for his dying baby chick.

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A duct walks into a bar. The writer meant to write duck and then proceed to make a clever joke but instead a typo was made and a very unlikely occurence was writtern about considering air passages are not capable of walking and would most likely already be in the ceiling of the bar as too bring fresh air into the bar is important.

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How do you make a plumber cry? Kill his family.

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Jo Brand no longer looks like a ball sack draped over a football.

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how do you call someone? use a phone

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Dead girls can't say no.

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What's both fun and a scam? -The holocaust

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Two muffins are in an oven. One muffin says to the other muffin, "Sure is hot in here." The other muffin says, "AHHHH! A talking muffin."

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Why does the Easter Bunny hide his eggs? So nobody finds he's been fucking hens.

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I am paralyzed from the neck down.

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What's black and white and red all over? Half a black face and half a white face after going through a blender

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Whats worse than hard cheese?Cheese DUH

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Real Joke: The US Air Force operates Seymour Johnson Air Force Base. It is named for a seaman. Go look it up.

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Q. bob had 93 chocolate bars and ate 74 what does he have now? A. diabetes

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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