What happened to the child drowning in a pool? He was saved by the well-trained lifeguard.

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A man brings his entire family in to meet a show producer. The producer says, "Okay, let's see what you got." The man then proceeds to lead his family through a variety of acts, including showcasing the proper way to drink English tea and how to dress for a polo match. When they finish, the producer asks, "And just what do you call your act?" To which the man replies, "The Aristocrats!"

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What did the monkey say to the lion? I'm being sexually abused by my handler, and feel so violated.

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penis

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why did the man have a hole in his face? because syphillis had eaten a hole in it

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Why was six afraid of seven? Because seven was black.

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people say i have big feet but you know what the say about people with big feet? :) big socks. sl

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What does a vegetarian eat? colored penis

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How do you make a penguin fly? You strap it to the roof of a plane.

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Why did the Europeans colonise Africa Because they couldn't do it themselves

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nolan is gay

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What's worse than a fake bomb? Do I really have to answer that?

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Roses are red violets are blue I have alziemers banana cookie!

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What makes George Michael gay? The fact he engages in sexual intercourse with other men.

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A man is watching a football game and sees a comercial for a medicine that boosts testosterone levels. However, this man has no issues with his testosterone levels, so he proceeds to watch the rest of the game and then goes to bed.

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What did Batman say to Robin before they got in the batmobile? 'Get in the batmobile Robin'

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Ily bae

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Large 4

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Man 1: Ask me if im a flower Man 2: "are you a flower?" Man 1: if i was a flower do you think i could talk? man 1 was wondering why man 2 was so uneducated

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A Jew walks into a bar. He immediately turns around and walks out because prices at this particular high end bar are much too high for his liking.

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What did the cat say to the dog? Meow

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How can you tell I'm the biggest idiot in the room? Look at me.

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"I see!" said the blind man, as he picked up a saw and hammer.

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ROSES ARE RED VILOTS ARE BLUE I HOPE YOU KNOW IM A JEW

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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