roses are red, violates are blue, you left me for David, I am about to kill you *bam* *bam**bam*

A Priest, a Rabbi and a Shaman walk into a bar. The Bartender looks at them and says "What is this a Joke?"

"Wow, that was so funny i fell off my dinosaur!" Dinosaurs went extinct in the late Cretaceous period, about 65 million years ago. Commonly believed by scientists across the world to have been caused by an ancient meteor that crashed in the current day Yucatán peninsula in Mexico. Also, even if you were around during the Cretaceous period, i assure you that no dinosaur would let you climb on top of it, let alone ride it while you're not highly terrified because of the sheer danger of the experience. Now unless you are 65 million years old, I highly doubt you laughed so hard that you fell off the dinosaur that you supposedly own.

Why can't so many guys get it up? Because erectile dysfunction affects 30 million men nationwide.

How do you kill a fat guy Keep giving him food he'll die eventually.

What haircut did Timmy get at the barbershop? He didn't, he saved money from the barber by going through chemo.

Q:Whats worse, being chased by a chainsaw or being dunked on by LeBron James? A:Since a chainsaw has one of the sharpest metal blades know to mankind, it would be the chainsaw. Although this reguires effort, it is a known fact that Lebron James has been dunked on by some kid at Xaiver, so I would think the chainsaw would hurt more.

test test

Q: Why was the Asian teacher fired from her job? A: Because she always showed to school too late and to make matters worse the school had recently found out that she was a raging alcoholic.

why did benny go to the 4th grade school nurse? he had a massive erection.

Why was the black man eating fried chicken and watermelon? He was at home

Sometimes I finger myself to some Madonna and Mary J. Blige shit. - Jesse

Jet fuel doesn't melt steel beams,heat does.

Guess what? You guessed it.

2 guys walk into a bar but the third one has known about what happens to the third guy but since he is reading this in a newspaper and his unaware of his surroundings he walks into the bar anyway and feels very foolish.

A blonde runs into her house. She died in a tragic backdraft fire. Always check to see if the doorknob is warm.

What does a fish and a truck have in common? Nothing. One is a fish & one is a truck.

What did the little boy with no arms and legs get for his birthday? A baseball, bat, and a glove.

Person 1: knock knock Person 2: Who's there? Person 1: nobody Person 2: nobody who? Person 1: ............

What looks like mud, smells like mud and eats mud? An African

Why are Anti-jokes funny? Coz they are not.

What's the difference between a Ferrari and a pile of dead babies? I don't have a Ferrari in my garage?

Q. Why did the fence break? A. Too many mexicans were climbing it.

you know whats funny?! nine eleven!

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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