An iguana walks out of a bar

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A kid is Jackin off and his dad walks in and says if you keep jackin off you will loose your sight. the kid says dad im over here.

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You're an Irish male that walks into a bar full of Mexicans. Upon entering you are approached by two topless women. ....You realize you have been coming to the same sleazy strip club on the edge of town every night after work for the past few years. After seeing that you have gradually become completely bald and neglect your two children and wife, you recognize your extreme depression. Strippers now see you as a consistent, "paying customer" and you proceed seek psychiatric care, while being prescribed anti-depressants. The Mexicans at the bar are hard working, tax-paying citizens that would like to provide an education for their children.

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An Arian man walks into a German-owned bar and asks to use the restroom. The bartender sees this acceptable and allows it. Soon after, a Jewish man asks the same question, but this time the bartender said no. The Jewish man thought it was an outrage and demanded why, so the bartender calmly explained to him that the Arian man was still using the restroom and that when he was finished the Jewish man was free to poo as he pleased.

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What do you call a man with 3 legs and one arm jumping on a trampoline? By his name.

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What did the Pillow say to the Blanket? Nothing. Inanimate objects do not contain the ability to speak, therefore they could not possibly say anything to each other.

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What is the difference between a black guy and a bucket of crap? Well, one consists of two inanimate objects (a bucket and feces) and the other is a human being of African/African-American descent. As you can see there really is no real comparison here.

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No.

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What is green, ugly and can't empty his bowels without exerting a tremendous amount of energy? A constipated, ugly, green thing.

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Roses are red, Violet are blue, This is Sparta, I am a chair

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What's brown and wears glasses? A poo with bad eyesight.

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Q; What smells like chicken, tastes like turkey and looks like duck? A; Nothing...dumbass.

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How do you keep a dog from barking? Kill it.

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Ruller

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Why did the man go to space? He was a highly trained astronaut

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What did the guy say to the mushroom?

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Why was 6 afraid of 7? 7 was a skank.

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Why did the rooster chase the chicken? - They were playing tag!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

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whats stupid, retarded, and dumb an Erin Perri.

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Jews for Jesus

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why did the chicken cross the road? who knows, we cannot read an animals (or a human for that matter) mind. Perhaps, though unlikely as he's a chicken, he saw a friend across the road or a child who wants to stroke him. Perhaps he is trying to escape being used as a circus act or being cooked for a supermarket. We cannot complain if the chicken wishes for a better life. Anyway, we shall never know why the chicken decided to cross the road, and never will, as it is dead after being hit by a car.

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Where did Susie go during the bombing? Everywhere

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What did the Leah say to the Pawneez? AWWWW YEAHHHHH!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

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Why did the White guy wanna be Black? He liked basketball.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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