how do you wake up a cat? you break it.

Why did the blond cross the road? The police officer who arrested her for shoplifting parked his car on the other side of the street.

What's big white and can't fly? -Half of America Whats big brown and can't fly? -Crap

Why did Little Suzy get hit by a truck? Well the real question is, "Why was Little Suzy in the road," so why was she? Because she felt like it.

One day Jesus said to John, " come forth and recieve everlasting life." Sadly John came in fifth and won a toaster.

ASIAN- Look me in the eyes Normal human being- open them

Did you hear the joke about the deaf guy ? He didn't.

A black man and a white women are having dinner at a fanncy resteraunt. The waitor asks "Who is the better tipper... I know and hands the check to the white women.

Why was the minority crying? He had something in his eye.

Why are people in Africa dying? because the majority of them have a lack of food and fresh water which effects their health.

One linners President Kinnedy did you like the parade President Lincon did you like the play

Antijokes...

What's big long, harry, and has glowing eyes? I dont know. Its under my bed. PLEASE SEND HELP!!!

How long did it take the man to swim the Atlantic? I don't know. Everybody stopped counting after a while and went on with their lives. His body was never found.

why did the boy drop his ice cream? a terrorist dropped a bomb on him which turned into a transformer, raped him and then burried him inside of his refridgerator

Why did the skeleton cross the road? Because Apocalypse arrived and dead people now have the ability to walk.

What do you call a black pilot? A pilot you racist.

What do you call a man who beats his adopted, black children? A terrible person.

Why to lawyers wear neckties? It's part of the uniform.

Why do most married men die before their wives? Men have on average a shorter life expectancy than women.

Why did the boy drop his ice cream cone? He got hit by a bus. Why did the bus crash? It hit a boy eating an ice cream cone.

Why did the little boy drop his ice cream? He got hit by a bus

Me:hey paul did you see that story on the news? Paul:ya i did thats really crazy!

A baby seal walks into a club.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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