What do you call two dog? dogs

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When someone calls me ugly, I run up and hug them, because I know how tough life is for the visually impaired.

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Q: What's worse than a black guy with a gun? A: the holocaust

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What do you get when you cross a Dachshund and a Nazi? Bestiality. Ew.

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a man walks into a bar.... his? drinking problem is seriously affecting his family

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What did the german speech therapist say to his mute patient? There a few methods we can use to help you obtain the power of speech.

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What did the poor boy get for Christmas? Orphaned.

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What do Miley and Billy Ray Cyrus have in common? Half their DNA

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Why did the chicken cross the road? he has an iq of 5 like all chickens

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A: I accidentally shot my sister with a rifle! B: you don't have a sister? A: exactly

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What gets you a succesful life and career? Swag

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what did the boy with cancer get for Christmas a pair of shoes

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A man walked into a blind child's house and made him see again. He stepped outside, walked into traffic, and died as he was not used to the light.

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Two men walk into a bar. The third man ducks. The rest of the bar patrons are thoroughly confused.

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What did the hitler youth kid get for Christmas? An easy bake oven and a G.I. Jew.

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Knock Knock Whos there Boo OWWW YOU ASS WAT THE F*%^ (crying)

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Yo momma so fat that when she sat on the bible jesus poped out.

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A hooker walks into a bar. She orders a few drinks and leaves. She's a man.

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what's the difference between a jew and a pizza? a jew is a member of a religion called Judaism, they're generally tall and have curly hair, however not in all situations is this true. They celebrate Chanukah and passover and many other holidays. Pizza is an italian dish, it's round, has red sauce and cheese on it and is pretty tasty.

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Two trains, each having a speed of 30km/h, are headed at each other on the same straight track. A bird that can fly 60km/h flies off the front of one train when they are 60km apart and heads directly for the other train. After reaching the other train, the bird flies directly back to the first train, and so forth. What is the total distance the bird travels before the train collide? Who cares about the bird if two trains are going to collide? You need to call this in immediately.

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In the attic lights Voices scream Nothin' seen Real's the dream Leaving the things that are real behind Leaving the things that you love from mind All of the things that you learned from fears Nothin' is left for the years Voices scream Nothin' seen Real's the dream Toys, toys, toys In the attic Toys, toys, toys In the attic Toys, toys, toys In the attic Toys, toys, toys In the attic Lights, voices scream Nothin' seen Real's the dream Leaving the things that are real behind Leaving the things that you love from mind All of the things that you learned from fears Nothin' is left for the years Voices scream Nothin' seen Real's the dream Toys, toys, toys In the attic Toys, toys, toys In the attic Toys, toys, toys In the attic Toys, toys, toys In the attic Toys, toys, toys In the attic Toys, toys, toys In the attic Toys, toys, toys In the attic

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there r three guys on a bridge. They r chinese,mexican,&american. They each have a bottle of beer. The chinese dude says I have enough of this in my country and throws it over the bridge. Then the mexican says I have enough of this in my country and throws it over the bridge. The american takes a drink of his and sets it down he looks at the mexican and says I have enough of these in my country and throws the mexican over the bridge.

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Why is Harry Potter fake Because its a movie

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how do u make a plummer cry? Kill his children.... :)

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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