When were in a zombie apocalypse I will make sure to save you for 40 days and then I will sacrifice you

What would you do if I jumped down your throat when you were talking? That would never happen, as it's impossible to even climb into somebody's mouth.

A Muslim man gets onto a transatlantic airliner. All the other passengers are privately nervous, but no one mentions it.

What do you call a schizophrenic Clown surrounded by 10,000 Amish gangsters, all armed with dildos? I don't know, but it would be a heck of a sight, wouldn't it?

what do you call a man with one leg? whatever his name is.

rarw

one man walked into a bar and ordered a beer. when he was drinking the beer he choked and died

I got 99 problems, and most of them involve my terminal illness.

Whats black, dead, and hangs from a tree in my backyard? Your Mom

Your momma's so fat: She feels uncomfortable in public due to current trends in ideal body shape and aesthetics of beauty.

ewrg

Knock knock. Who's there? Boo. Boo who? Boo Radley.

Who gave Miley Cyrus her new haircut? Hellen Keller

What do you call a Caucasian in Russia? Russian.

What separates man from animal? Divorce.

Why did the man scream when his dog ran into the room? Because he was afraid of dogs.

What came first... the chicken or the egg? How am I supposed to know?

What's worse than finding 16 dead babies in a tree? Finding 1 dead baby in 16 trees.

How many electricians does it take to change a lightbulb? One.

What's the best thing about having sex with twenty six year old's? I am twenty one and prefer older ladies as I find them more experienced and mature.

Doctor doctor, i think i need glasses! Go to an opticians then...

Do you know what's hilarious? Not rape.

Why did the KFC worker dislike his job? He was paid lower than minumum wage due to the plummeting economy.

How do you make a plumber cry? Kill his family.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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