A man walks into a bar and orders 12 shots. "8?" Asks the bartender, to verify he had heard correctly. He feels unsure of giving the man 12 shots but does so anyways due to his financial situation and he hopes for a generous tip. Afterwards, the man kills 9 people in a car crash due to his level of intoxication and the bartender seeps into depression due to his feeling of guilt.

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How do you leave a jackass in suspense? I'll tell you later.

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Roses are red, Violets are glorious, Don't try to surprise Oscar Pistorius!

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Why did the plane crash? Because something was wrong with the engine

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If David has 40 chocolate bars and eats 35 what does David have now? Diabetes, David has diabetes.

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Q: What did the cop do when he saw a mexican in his car? A: Nothing, he was looking in a mirror.

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What is "race car" spelled backwards? rac ecar.

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Why did the chicken cross the road? Because he was an animal with a small brain and could not comprehend the situation.

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Why did the black man fall down the stairs? Because he was blind

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What's the difference between a man and a woman? The latter has two additional letters added to the beginning.

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a man walks into a bar, only it was an alternate universe so there were dogs running the bar. the bartender dog called human control because it was unsanitary to have a human in a bar. the human was then escorted out by another dog and was taken to a hotel where he received no continental breakfast.

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Q: What's worse than having a terrorist throw a fridge at you? A: World War 5

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your mom.

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Why don't women drive more? Because statistically the man offers to drive more frequently

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What do you call a mexican who works at a landscaping business? A hard working man who is trying to provide money for his family

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Fuzzy Wuzzy was a bear. Fuzzy Wuzzy had no hair Fuzzy Wuzzy died of cancer

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What do you call a dog with two tails? ...Depends what its name is.

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Why did Lucy fall off the swing? Someone chucked a fridge at her.

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Q: What is green, jumps and says i'm a frog? A: A frog that talks

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Why did Jimmy drop his ice cream? Because he was hit by a bus Knock Knock Who's there? Not Jimmy -thatcooltyguy

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my grandpa told me "dont let fear rule your life" 2 hours later he got hit by a train.

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Why are Indians so bad at football? Curry

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knock knock go away!!!

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A man walked into the woods with alzheimers......pancakes

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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