How do you make an emo kid cry? He already is.

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Why did Sally fall off the swing? She had no arms. Knock, knock. Who's there? Not Sally.

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What gets bigger and bigger and bigger, then dies? A baby.

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why didn't Marlin monroe ( http://fr.wikipedia.org/wiki/Marilyn_Monroe ) use the iphone app guitar hero because she died before the iphone was invented !

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Whats brown and rhyme's with "Snoop?" Dr. Dre

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What does a lonely man do on opposite day? I don't know. Why should we know what he does, that is both weird and illegal. Stalking is a serious crime and should not be used. We do not know what he does on normal days, thus we cannot come to a conclusion to this question. However, I do hypothesize that he must be social on this day because this is the opposite of lonely.

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A dwarf walked into a pizza shop and ordered a large pepperoni pizza advertised as $12.50. He gave some money to the man behind the counter who then said, "Sir, you're a little short." The dwarf replied, "My apologies, I thought I had given you a twenty." He gave the man behind the counter the difference he owed, took his pizza and left.

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A frog and a toad eat a pie and then realize it is weird and then die.

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A black man and a white man were both pulled over for street racing. They both were also found to be drunk driving. Only the black man was arrested. It turns out the black man had just massacred an entire Amish village before going street racing to celebrate.

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What did the Jew say to the black guy? Hey whatsup?

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If a brick said "hi" what you reply with? Nothing. You can't reply to something that doesn't speak.

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Q: What did the black kid get for Chirstmas? A: Your bike

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Exercise Ex - Er - Cise Ex - Ar - Size.. Eggs Are Sides For bacon.. BACON

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What did the hobo get for Christmas? Hypothermia

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Whats worse tan finding a worm in your apple? Being touched by Michael Jackson

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Why did the man run away from the cat? He was allergic

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Why Was the straight man in love ? because he was an intelligent human being who had the formula of understanding woman .

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What hurts more than a bee sting? Child birth.

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"Ask me if I'm a tea pot" "Are you a tea pot?" "No" Try this on your friends

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Little Jack Horner sat in a corner, Dead.

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Q: Whats about two feet in width and length with purple veins throbbing at the sides? A: A midget slowly dying of frostbite

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How does micheal Jackson know when it's bed time? When the big hand touches the little hand.

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whats better than 1,000,000 dollars? 1,000,001 dollars

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“DTF”? Says Will. “No” says Harper.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

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