Santa and a smart blonde jump of a cliff. Who gets to the ground first? Neither, they don't exist.

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A black man, a white man and a Jewish man all live in the same apartment block. Which is most likely to be at work? None of them, it's Sunday. [L]

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What do you call the man with no arms or legs, swimming in the bay? Bob.

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Yo momma's so skinny she doesn't have any fat!

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if your having girl problems i feel bad for you son, i don't have any.

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Why did the idiot take a selfie with his phone underwater? Because he's an idiot

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A man walks into a doctor's office and says "Doctor, it hurts when I poke my leg like this!" The doctor replies "That because there's a knife in your hand."

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What did Batman say to Robin before they got in the car? Get in the car.

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Who lives in a pineapple under the sea? Gary.

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Why did Dracula cross the road? To get to the other unbitten virgin.

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How do you piss off a redneck? You wait until he is done fucking his sister and then you steal his truck.

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your mom is so fat, that your father is no longer attracted to her and it is tearing your family apart.

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What do you call a guy with a rainbow tuxedo on? A classy man that is very well dressed

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I don't understand what's so bad about a worm in your apple. Just get the proper software to clean it up, or even better, get a PC

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What did the spatula say to the door handle? Nothing. Inanimate objects are incapable of speaking.

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Hey, you why you say poo poo nae nae watch me whip, and do the dougie, and then happy halloween? Potato Salad

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What did the Macedonian guy say to the Croatian guy? Both of our countries are from the former Yugoslavia.

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Why couldn't the man walk? He lost his legs when he stepped on a land mine in Afghanistan.

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What happens when you get caught inside a tornado? You don't, the debris around you will most certainly kill you before you get close to the tornado.

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There once was a man from Nantucket, With a penis so long he could suck it. He said with a grin, as he wiped off his chin, If my ear was a cunt, that’d be strange.

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a black guy walks into a store and is caught stealing things the police are called they get there and hes calmly escorted to the police car

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Why was the asian bad at sex? Because he was 5 years old

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Dey see me boilin' Dey choppin' God I'm so fresh and juicy So fresh and juicy So fresh and juicy So fresh and juiiiiiiccccy! MR MCCANN

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What did the rabbi say to the Muslim? I don't know I wasnt there. But it probably had something to do with their varying religions.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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