Why couldn't the mother make her son's funeral? She died in a car crash on the way there.

what has 4 legs three eyes and a horn? a:yo mama

why can't Michael Jackson bake a pie???? Because he's dead

See now, that is because you consider yourself my submissive on a both concious and subconcious level, your body and mind wants me to take care of you. I could say it is because I read minds, but why read minds, when I can create them, why read the future, when you can create it. Finally, lets take a look into the word, nerve endings yes? Not nerve endings baby, its called Suggestion. But seriously though, lets put the word nerve endings on top of the word suggestions again there. Nerve endings, did I mention it works on your butt too? You see, usually you would say no, but you do know that now that I am your master, you do and enjoy as I say? See you baby. Moral: "Feel the grove, I control the way you move"

Why couldn't Mary see the painting? Because she had no face.

Mommy, why did daddy leave? Because you touch yourself at night sweetie.

A new scientific study has scientists baffled as it clearly shows that teen sex drastically decreases at age 20.

Why did the duck turn black? an oil spill

What do you call literature that's depressing and hard to read? ...a valued part of the English curriculum

Why was 6 afraid of 7? Because 7 had two penises.

Why did the man cross the road? Because the light was red!

yo moma so stupid she went to the dentist for a bluetooth.

What fruit is used to make apple juice? Apples

What do you call a lot of goose in one place? geese

Two black guys were walking down a street to meet up a local drug dealer. Turns out the black guys were undercover cops who arrested the drug dealer and both recieved awards for finding the criminal.

A jew walk's into a bar. But actually it was a Gas chamber.

Q: What did the farmer say when he lost his tractor ? A: The holocaust

a man touches girls butt ...... she sharts her pants

What's worse than biting into an apple and finding a worm? Biting into a worm and finding an apple

Q: What do people usually find funny? A: A joke.

A chinese man walks into a kitten store. He is a nice man in search of a companion.

Q: What said the first bagel to the other? A: Nothing! Bagels can't talk!

What's the difference between a dead baby and my dinner??? Nothing...

What's the most confusing day in the ghetto? Fathers day.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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