Roses are red, Violets are blue, i have Alzheimers, Roses are red

thumb_up thumb_down +8

What do you do if your walking into a room full of Lions and Jaguars? You stop walking.

thumb_up thumb_down +8

Why did humpty dumpty fall off a wall? Well it turns out that he was a raging psycopath. to add on, he was also a suicidal

thumb_up thumb_down +8

Text this number just cuz 16305208722

thumb_up thumb_down +8

What's the difference between heaven and hell? Hell likes you more.

thumb_up thumb_down +8

At first I was at the party and I was like YOLO!! But then I got pregnant and was like yolo....

thumb_up thumb_down +8

Ernie: "Hey Jim, how many licks does it take to get to the tootsie roll center of a tootsie pop?" Jim then breaks down and cries deeply at Ernie's question as the fact that he was born without a tongue continues to slowly tear him apart.

thumb_up thumb_down +8

y did simran cros rode? 2 get 2 uder side ofcurse. stopid nobs

thumb_up thumb_down +8

How do you make a blond cry? You punch her in the face.

thumb_up thumb_down +8

Knock Knock, Who's there? Alzheimer's Alzheimer's who? Knock Knock...

thumb_up thumb_down +8

roses are red violets are blue im a paki and you are a jew!

thumb_up thumb_down +8

A cripple and a Jew walk into a bar. They sit down and begin to discuss all the stigmas that they have faced their entire lives. The conversation goes on for an hour, at which point a black man walks in. Just then, the bar explodes and they all die.

thumb_up thumb_down +8

What do you call a Gay leprechaun? A homosexual ginger man with a pretty green outfit.

thumb_up thumb_down +8

Why does Obama not want to get buried? because he's still alive

thumb_up thumb_down +8

No, Sarah. You know your hooks scratch the keys.

thumb_up thumb_down +8

there once was a black man who played basketball

thumb_up thumb_down +8

Why did the African cross the road? Because he was searching for his family after his village was massacred by rebel soldiers.

thumb_up thumb_down +8

What does the Fawkes say? "Remember, remember, the 5th of November..."

thumb_up thumb_down +8

The little girl asks her father "Daddy why is santa fat?" "you have to exist to lose weight" he answered

thumb_up thumb_down +8

Roses are red Grass is green Get in the van If you know what I mean

thumb_up thumb_down +8

why can't hellen keller eat a pizza? because she is dead.

thumb_up thumb_down +8

Kirstie Alley is soooo fat! How fat is she? Well, she's so fat that she's in grave danger of developing heart disease, and death

thumb_up thumb_down +8

What's Green and has four wheels? A green car

thumb_up thumb_down +8

The word you are looking for is charm, not seduction, I am above such things, and while I have no reason whatsoever to believe either one of us can gain anything from going "eye for an eye", I am sure I can offer whatever financial and even specialized assistance you might require in order to get that eye of yours seeing clearer than before... Worry not, I shall outlaw the name Nero and all the derivations and similarities from my Order, unless someone named Nero actually happens to come by of course...

thumb_up thumb_down +8

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...


Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops