Your mom goes to college. Actually, she graduated a while back!

What did the women get after valentines day? An abortion.

A muslim man takes a flight to New York. He lands safely at JFK airport.

Why did the cow cross the road? He probably saw a delicious looking patch of grass on the otherside.

Why did the little boy throw his clock out of the window? After hours of searching for the snooze button to no avail, the little boy became so irritated at the incessant ringing of the alarm that he threw it out of his window in a fit of rage. The clock landed on an old woman who was walking twenty stories below. She was immediately killed on impact.

Where did the two Jews ride when they got married? In the back of the oven.

A man walks into a bar. He then says "ow".

Why was 6 afraid of 7? Because 7 was a convicted rapist.

How many Polacks does it take to screw in a light-bulb? One. A person's ethnicity or country of origin, or religion for that matter, would have no bearing on one's ability to perform the relatively simple task of installing a light-bulb. Furthermore, there is no reason to use the negative slur 'polack' when referring to a person of Polish descent.

Why should you never shower with a pokemon? Pokemon is a game for children. In doing so you would greatly disturb your child who is quite fond of pokemon

What did the straw say to the other straw? We are both straws just kidding they cant talk

Knock knock! Who's there? Hitler, time to shower!

A priest and a rabbi walk into a bar. The priest has his papers but the rabbi is sent to a concentration camp.

Roses are red Violets are blue I have Alzheimer's And add extra pepperoni

Knock knock It's open, come in

What does Michael have in common with NASA? Not a lot.

Your mom.

What did the pig do when the farmer died? He just stood there cause pigs are stupid.

A: How can you tell a tree is an aspen? B: 'Cause of the way it is.

A ham sandwich walks into a bar, bartender says "We don't serve food here."

How many black men does it take to change a light bulb? TO GET TO THE OTHER SIDE!

Why did Jimmy's mom cry? She got stabbed in the arm and was suffering while bleeding to death.

How do you find the richest person in Mexico? You get the census of income per citizen and see who is at the top.

A pregnant woman walks into a bar and miscarries.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

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