Why did the girl drop her lolly pop? She was hit by a bus.

School means: Seven Crappy Hours Of Our Lives

An Unicorn walks into a club, the bartender promised to quit drugs and thanks to that his family didn't fall apart and he lived happily till he was 89 when he passed away surrounded by loved ones.

What's in there? Get outta there...

What did Helen Keller get at the store? Glasses

Whats Orange,Leathery gets passed around by sweaty dudes and the next name will start with an S Snooki

What did the baby get for his 1st birthday? Nothing, he was a Harlequin baby, therefore dying during the last stages of pregnancy.

What did the young girl with leukemia say to a stranger? I am afraid

A man comes home late from work what does he find? His wife and children murdered.

this going to be my new text thingy! i dont have a phone! WATS UP!

Two ducks are in a pond. The one duck asks, "Can you pass the soap?" The other duck says, "What do I look like, a typewriter?"

What is the big difference between chopped pork and pea soup? One of them involves the killing of an intelligent animal and the other involves the harvesting of seeds from a non-sentient plant.

Why was six afraid of seven? Well, seven has a huge drinking problem. He killed a man in a bar fight once. He is also very intense about his boxing career. He works out so hard that he is huge. He has enormous anger problems as well. Seven isn't the only one with problem though. Six is a Vietnam veteran and has been easily scared ever since he came home. The psychiatrist says he has a bad case of paranoia. Just something about seven reminds six of the soldiers that killed his friends. Also seven ate nine, and cannibals are SCARY!

A ship sinks in the middle of the South Pacific, only one man survives. He swims over to a deserted island.

Roses are red Bacon is also red Poems are hard Bacon

how do you drown a blonde? chain her to a cinder block and throw her off a bridge.

Q: What did the redneck say with missing front teeth? A: "I can only eat things with my back teeth and I have AIDS."

A white police officer pulled over a black guy on the highway. The cop asked him for license and registration. The black guy had a tail light out, and was very polite and cooperative. The two became close friends, but then one night, the black guy went to the house of the white cop. The black guy brought his wife and daughter over for a dinner party, eating grilled turkey sandwiches with mayonnaise. When the cop's attractive wife asked the black guy if he would like some fresh watermelon from the patch in their back yard, he respectfully declined, for he needed to return to his own home to patiently wait for a business call from one of his employees, who was also a very intelligent and hard working African male. Once home, the black guy turned on his stereo, to listen to some calming country music at an appropriately low level of volume, as his daughter and wife had gone to sleep, for the wife also had work in the morning, at her law firm, and her daughter had a job interview after her day of classes at Dartmouth were out for the day... then Martin Luther King Jr. woke up from his dream, and was soon thereafter assassinated.

Someone thought that an onion was the only food that made you cry. So I threw a watermelon at his face.

A rat scurries into a bar. Six days later, all of the people in that bar die of bubonic plague.

a black guy and a mexican are in a car, who's driving? a taxi driver.

what did the black kid get for Christmas? your bike

I once bought a pack of batteries but they weren't included.

A man walks into a bar. He's blind.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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