There once was a man from Nantucket, but he's dead.

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Why did the chicken cross the road? Because his parents died.

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Do you want to hear a knock knock joke? (Yes) Okay, you start. (Knock knock). Who's there? ...

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Uncle Eugene enjoyed to drive. Then he was killed in a car crash.

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There is an Englishman, Irishman and Scotsman and they are climbing up a mountain, when they reach the top and decide to climb down again.

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Why did Sarah fall off the swing? She had no arms. Knock Knock Who's there? Not Sarah.

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I'm on the seafood diet, a large proportion of my daily food intake consists of fish.

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What do you call a person falling off a cliff Dead

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A basket full of puppies can do anything, except put out a fire.

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One kid clicks his pen. The kid sitting next to home clicks his pen. They next 3 kids click their pens. The teacher walks by and says "monkey see monkey do." And the kid that first clicked his pen responded and says "monkey pees all over you."

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"I see" said the blind man to his dead wife

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Why did the chicken cross the road? Nobody knows. Chickens aren't capable of knowing why they do things.

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A baby seal walks in to a club

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Two muffins are sitting in an oven. One muffin says to the other, "Boy, it's hot in here!" The second muffin replies, "Yes, I'm in a lot of pain. Also, I've had a headache for quite a while now. I went to the doctor last Thursday and he preformed an X-ray but the results are not back yet. This extreme heat is likely worsening my already fragile physical health."

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Wanna hear a joke? No.

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some one knocked on tims door, at the same exact time, someone died in africa

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Knock Knock Who's there? Dave Dave who? Dave's crying because his grandmother has alltimers and now can't remember his name

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One penguin says to another penguin, "It looks like you are wearing a tuxedo." The other penguin says, "Yea, I have to go to dinner party later."

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Haikus are easy They are simpler than you think Just don't run out of...

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You are the third derivative of the position function.

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Knock Knock Who's there? Hodor

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What do you call burt and ernie if they were black?? A couple of n*ggers

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Wanna hear a joke!? Miley Cyrus.

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i like potatoes But only mashed baked are a little bad they arent tasty. I like food good because food bad can really hurt me

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops