Q: what's white on the top and black on the bottom? A: Society

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Why was Timmy sad? While helping his dad hang Christmas light, he got tangled up in them and fell down. While falling he grabbed a wire, which caused a spark. This spark lit the house on fire. Since he broke most of the bones in his body from falling he could not run away. The house proceeded to collapse an poor Timmy seriously injuring and hideously disfiguring him. By the time the ambulance got there, Timmy was the only survivor for his parents died of smoke inhalation. Since he had no other living relatives he was forced to live in an orphanage for the rest of his childhood. That is why Timmy is sad.

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Why was the African American man afraid of dogs? He had a terrible childhood memory of being violently dry humped by a german shepherd.

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What did Jesus say as he walked on water and people went like WOHOO! OMG WE ARE TOTALLY GOING TO CHISEL THIS INTO JEWTUBE SO EVERYONE CAN SEE! "BEHOLD AS I WALK UPON THIS WATER WHILE ALL OF YOU HAVE FAILED BEFORE ME! ONLY I CAN WALK OF THIS WATER OF FROZEN WITHOUT SLIPPING! Nero: Because go fuck yourself asshole. Lol... Jewtube was not as widely available as youtube so yeah... Walking on ice without falling over was a big thing back then... You know such as OMG! EATING BREAD AND DRINKING WINE! WOOOOOOAAAAH SCIENCE! AND BURNING BUSHES SPOKE AND... Moral: "Ill be back, you know, just to annoy you, and because I want to, a real man needs no other reason, and that is why you fuckers need so many of them"

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Continents are large islands.

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What kind of pizzas did they last order at the World Trade Center? Pepperoni

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Knock Knock.

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Why did anna stop wanting to build a snowman? Beacuse she died of cancer.

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Why is elmo sad? He was brutally raped by Dora :D

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What did the man say when he lost his car? Where the fuck did my car go

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What do you call a bird that can't fly? an ostrich

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Why didn't the woman have a penis? Because she was female.

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Ouch, a papercut .. what could be worse? A hatchet cut.

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A jumpercable walks in the bar the bartender says ill get you something but dont start anything.

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What's silent but deadly? A baby falling from a 10 story building

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Why was the boy holding his breath? A man was holding his head under water.

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Q: What does Jerry Sandusky and bills have in common? A: They both come in the mail

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Your mommas so stupid she put a quarter into a parking meter and waited for a gumball to drop out.

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So there's a black man riding a bike down the street. A police officer pulls him over to tell him that his back tire seems to be flat. The black man says thank you, and continued riding his bike. Later, he would repair his tire.

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Guy 1: Why does it smell like a wet dog? Guy 2: Because I smell like a wet dog

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What do you call a jew in an oven? A safety hazard

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Kobe Bryant passing the ball

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What happened to the old man at his suprise party? He died from the shock.

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What is black and burns really well? charcoal.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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