Yo mommas so fat that when she walked into the ocean all the whales were far away. However, if the whales did happen to be closer to your mom it would be highly improbable that they would sing.

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What's worse than eating half a worm? Eating somebody's brain.

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Did you hear about the Polish couple taking selfies while on vacation in Portugal? They fell off a cliff and died in front of their children. True story.

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Do you know how I know you're gay? 'Cuz your dick taste like shit.

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Q: What do Captain Jack Sparrow, Captain Crunch, Captain Morgan and Captain Kangaroo all have in common? A: They are all caucasian

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What do you get when you cross a cat and a dog? A dead cat.

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Words with two W's or N's in them are awkward and unnecessary

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Why was 6 afraid of 7? 7 was a serial-rapist with links to the Black Dragon triad. Yee.

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Why so serious ?

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Why couldn't Helen Keller drive? Because she was blind and deaf.

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My mom farted, she also has Alzheimer's, I also have Alzheimer's. Also pizza didn't like it

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Why was timmy live on the streets? His parents didnt have the money to abort him!! HaHa

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What's better than finding a $5.00 bill on the floor? Finding the person who actually owns it.

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when life throws you lemons you should probably get out of the way because it will hurt

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A terrorist robs a walrus.

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I was lying in bed looking at the stars in the sky What did i think to myself? Were the heck is the ceiling???

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Jo Brand no longer looks like a ball sack draped over a football.

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What do you call a guy who likes men? Gay

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Roses are red Violets are blue Plants are green because of the high levels of mitochondria in their cells.

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what did the homeless person get for Cristmas? nothing.

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Who did sally vote for in 1920 Nobody woman couldnt vote until 1928

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Why'd the chicken cross the road? Because the light was green.

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anti-joke.ru - russian style

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Q: What did the Jew get for Christmas? A: Nothing you dumbass, Jews don't celebrate Christmas.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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