What happened to the vegetarian when he tried outdoor survival He died due to lack of energy because of his refusal to eat meat and or any living substance

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A women answers the phone. -"Hello?" -"Yes, hi, have I reached the Smiths?" -"No, you've reached the wrong number" The two women hand up, and continue with their lives.

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What happens when you give a fat man scissors? He cuts off the foreskin of your penis.

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Yo mumma so poor that she dosent have any money

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Joke below was made by Daniel Textor, he's a d i c k.

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Why did the squirrel fall out of the tree? Because it was dead. Why did the second squirrel fall out of the tree? Because it was stapled to the first one. Why did the third squirrel fall out of the tree? Because it thought it was a game. Why did the tree fall over? Because it thought it was a squirrel.

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Joe has 30 candy bars and eats 25. What does john have now? DIABETIES. Joe has diabeties. Please comment!!!!!!!

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What do the Africans have for breakfast? Nothing.

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A horse walks into a bar. The horse says "why the short face?"

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steven hawking walks into a bar just kidding he has a horrable disiese preventing him from walking

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What's sad about 4 black people in a Cadillac going over a cliff? Nothing, they were the ones convicted of raping that white girl.

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If an oak tree falls in the woods, and the tree has 3 squirrel nest in them, then does a whale jizz in the ocean?

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Why did timmy's face turn red? Early that morning Timmy was brutally attacked by the local street gang which proceeded to smack timmy's face with a baseball bat and smearing the blood with a dirty rag.

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What did the homeless guy get for Christmas ? Frostbite

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why don't bears wear shoes? because they have bear feet

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That awkward moment when a loved one dies.

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what's the difference between Michael Jackson and Acne? Acne is a skin problem caused by chemical imbalance usually found in teenagers. Michael Jackson was a singer and dancer who should've been able to escape tasteless jokes upon his death.

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woman's rights

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A good antijoke? Going to the last few pages of the "Popular" antijoke section....

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What do you call a black man holding a stone with bloody hands A hard working stone mason

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Roses are bitches Violets are two, your mother is a bigger bitch then both

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knock knock *opens door* WE DON'T WANT ANY!

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How meny Jews can you fit in an ash-tray? None. There to big

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School is like a boner. It is long and hard unless your asian.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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