A:Wanna hear a joke? B: Sure A: A joke

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What's black and white and in the desert? Tourists being held hostage by a tribe.

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Whats funny? Your face.

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What's worst then getting struck by lightening? your face.whats worse then seeing your face? NOTHING

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You know what's funnier than a pile of dead babies? A pile where one's alive in the middle, and has to eat his way out.

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Why did the girl fall off the swing? Because I hit her with an axe.

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Why did the black man laugh at my joke? k.

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What is Cleopatra's favorite cookie? A: Chips Ahoy

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What's Worse Than World War I 2 World War I's

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What trees do fortune tellers look at? Whichever variety of species are indigenous to where they live.

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Why did the sloth cross the road? To slaughter your entire family.

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Boy: Hey girl if I had hand-cuffs, I’d lock myself to you right now! Girl: I would find that extremely creepy.

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This is not an anti-joke... A man is walking down a street and see's a small boy crying in an alley. The man walks up to him and asks him "What's wrong little guy?" The boy replies that his family is poor, they just got evicted from there house and his parents decided to kill themselves. The man decides out of guilt to bring the boy home and support him for a few days. Three days later the man see's a note on the couch that says "Thank You..." Signed Jamal. The man sighs and says to himself "Your Welcome." The man walks into his room and see's the boy's body in his closet. He starts hysterically laughing and cries into his pillow for many minutes. When he is done sobbing he asks himself "What could be worst than this?" The man walks to his kitchen asking that question over and over. He reaches into his cabinet and grabs his cereal and pours into his bowl. The boy walks out chuckling and says, "Bye bye..." The man was poisoned and died. Now the boy get's the other cereal out and is about to pour it only to find out it was empty. "Screw the Holocaust this SUCKS!!!!!"

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What do you call a half man half manatee? A manatee

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In the attic lights Voices scream Nothin' seen Real's the dream Leaving the things that are real behind Leaving the things that you love from mind All of the things that you learned from fears Nothin' is left for the years Voices scream Nothin' seen Real's the dream Toys, toys, toys In the attic Toys, toys, toys In the attic Toys, toys, toys In the attic Toys, toys, toys In the attic Lights, voices scream Nothin' seen Real's the dream Leaving the things that are real behind Leaving the things that you love from mind All of the things that you learned from fears Nothin' is left for the years Voices scream Nothin' seen Real's the dream Toys, toys, toys In the attic Toys, toys, toys In the attic Toys, toys, toys In the attic Toys, toys, toys In the attic Toys, toys, toys In the attic Toys, toys, toys In the attic Toys, toys, toys In the attic

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I was taking a major shiit in the bathroom stalls at the college and someone walked in on me, talk about awkward

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Yo momma is so stupid, she has no job, five kids, and six weeks to live, due to the fact she spent all her money on cigarettes and now has lung cancer.

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You: Did u hear the one about that guy walking into a bar? Them: No. You: He said it hurt

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How many people with Alzheimer's does it take to screw in a lightbulb? To get to the other side.

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What did Emmanuel Frimpong say to George Elokobi? you sir, are DENCH

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What has two leg, but cant walk? A paraplegic.

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Joke- Blah Blah Blah, punch line -LOL -Shut the hell up

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Q: What's circlular and has two hands? A: A skinny person, i was kidding about the circular part!

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Much to my surprise, the Hoover Dam was not built by beavers.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

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