Q. what happend to the guy who walked by an alley in new york? A. he got beat up by a robber wich took hes money, cellphone, keys and his abillity to walk.

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Q:Why didn't the Mexican get out of the box? A:Because he liked it in the box.

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why did the person die? He was 90 years old and was sick. Its natural

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What's the different between jelly and jam? I can't jelly my penis up your butthole

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I was lying in bed looking at the stars in the sky What did i think to myself? Were the heck is the ceiling???

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What is more black than a Nigerian marathon runner? The night sky

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What did the woman say to the man before she had sex with him? "May I have sex with you, please?"

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What did the muffin, say to the other muffin? Nothing. Because muffin's are inanimate objects, therefore incapable of speech, or any other sentient action. They baked quietly until the man who was baking them came to the conclusion they were fit for consumption, devoured them, and went on with his day.

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What's the difference between Little Billy and Ice Cream? People like Ice Cream.

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Your legs are more open than my back door! Which is closed.

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What did the douche bag get for Christmas?

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Why is Texas so hot? The sun

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Why doesn't the little boy talk to his mom? Because she smells like barbecue sauce.

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Why did Susie fall off the swings? She had no arms. Knock! Knock! Who's there? Not Susie.

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What happened when Glen jumped off a building? The rope snapped his neck. He died.

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how do you rube out a circle? don't draw one

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How do you drown a blonde? Force her head underwater until she can no longer breathe, thus shutting down her brain and killing her.

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djkldfnblfnbofgb

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Why are the dinosaurs extinct? A meteor hit the Yucatan Peninsula and caused a blast that covered the earth and killed them all.

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nick walked into macdonalds... everyone stood up and left as they saw the potential danger in the situation.. nick later ended up bieng hit by a bus after chasing a duck

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Whats 9 plus 10? 19

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If monkeys ate trees, than what would trees be made out of? No one knows because that will never happen.

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How many dead guys does it take to build a shed? None. The contractor did it for 40 dollars an hour using maple wood.

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My wife is so fat that I find her unattractive.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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