Why did the girl stop running? Because she is in a wheelchair and will never walk again

There once was a man from Nantucket. He was among thousands of men who were also from Nantucket.

Why did the chicken cross the road? To get to your house... Knock, knock Who's there? The chicken.

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Ask me if I'm a truck! Are you a truck?! No.

Did you fall from heaven? Cause your face is pretty messed up!

What's your favorite Sylvia Plath quote? "Turn on the oven."

I see you driving 'Round town with the girl I love And I'm like, Haiku!

Emily Scarpello...Fat Couch

If a red house is made out of red bricks, and a blue house is made out of blue bricks, what is a green house made out of? Green bricks.

A family goes to a talent agency and performs an act. They call themselves the aristocrats

Neo Nero, why did you not tell me that Nero7 is dead? When was the funeral held? Where is he buried? At point Zero? Please I need to know, he was basically my father, or rather all that my father never was, at least I dont have to wonder if he will ever come back... I understand your anger, even if I am not even close to following your extreme ideals, please tell me the code, the proof that you are not one of the Spetznas or the Nazi`s. "Eliza"

Why did the chicken cross the road? To go home and beat his wife

Whats worse than the holocaust? WNBA

Knock Knock Who's there? Its the pizza man. Get your yellow no good keister off my property before I pump your guts full of lead. 1,2...10

sir ya look like ron weasly hhahahahaha LEL

Roeses Are Red Violets Are Blue He's The One For Me And Not For You, And If You Try To Take My Place I Will Take My Fist And Smash Your Face(:

A zebra and a giraffe are out in a safari and they see some humans. And then the cow, was drinking, the man was milking the drink, when the giraffe was going to buy some milk. She said, the was yeah okay.

What is wrong with black stereotypes? Nothing! Basketball is pretty fun if you try it!

How do you save the world in 2012? You aren't. 2012 isn't going to happen!

Why did Susie fall off the swing? She had no arms. Knock Knock. Who's there? Not Susie.

Why did the black man offer the girl flowers? It was his niece's birthday.

Roses are Red Violets are Blue There's suppose to be a fourth line.

Your mamas so old. When she farted dust came out.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

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