A blind man walk in to a bar... He then yells a 4 letter explative, backs up, and walks around it.

I stabbed a person. No seriously, I just stabbed them. There's no punchline. Just Just Stab wounds.

Do you want to hear a joke? No.

What did the bird say to the other bird? Nothing because birds can't talk.

Lebron James got a new iPhone, but he has to keep it on vibrate because he doesn't have any rings.

What do you call Justin Bieber's assassin? A hero doing a noble favor to the community.

Your mumma's so ugly. Period.

When life gives you gators, make Gatorade.

Hi I'm makena. I'm a cynical asshole

Q. What do you call a person with no arms, legs, torso, or head? A. A mutilated corpse.

Roses are black. Violets black. Guns are black. My van is black.

Why did the frog commit suicide? Because his mother was a typewriter

Knock Knock. Who's there? The police. You're under arrest. The police you're under arrest who? Sir, if you don't open up the door we're going to have to open it ourselves. We have a warrant for your arrest. Sir if you don't open up the door we're going to have to open it ourselves we have a warrant for your arrest who? Sir we are authorized to use deadly force. If you don't comply we will shoot to kill. Sir we are authorized to use deadly force if you don't comply we will shoot to kill wh-

Roses are red, Violets are red, Why do I have a Virtual Boy?

Sticks and stones may break my bones, but words are merely the smallest element of language capable of containing meaning and isolation and, as such could never directly produce the 4,000 Newtons of force per square centimetre required to break bones.

why did superman die, aids he got from wonder women

Who won the race through the underpass, the black man or the polish man? The black man as he crossed the finish line several seconds earlier.

Why are women such horrible drivers? Their hair gets in the way.

A women was driving along in her brand new, swanky, red ferrari when she spotted a red light in the distance. She stopped steadily, following the rules of the road. All of a sudden a loud bang came from behind her where a young driver had hit her at 50 mph. They both come to an abrupt stop and exited their vehicles. The women says "Idiot, you just hit me!" The boys says "oh don't worry, I have insurance."

Q: What do you call a man with no arms and no legs on a doorstep? A: Matt.

Myth: Everyone but redheads has a soul. Fact: No one has a soul.

A man walks into a bar. The bartender asks what he'd like to drink. The man pulls out his gun, shoots the surprised bartender, and proceeds to execute all the patrons of the bar and finally commit suicide. A post-mortem identification of the man identifies him as a victim of childhood sexual abuse and a diagnosed schizophrenic. There is a nice funeral for all the victims and the media respectfully minimizes exposure of the event.

Factors that can increase your risk of prostate cancer include: Older age Being black Family history of prostate cancer Obesity My friend's grandfather is black and obese, his 70th birthday is tomorrow and his dad died of prostate cancer

A black man and a white woman walk into a bar and celebrate their interracial marriage anniversary over a couple of drinks and then call a cab to avoid driving while intoxicated

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...