How did the chicken cross the road? Assuming the vehicles yielded to the chicken, it looked both directions before crossing then proceded across the street while staying between the crosswalk lines until it had reached the other side of the road.

thumb_up thumb_down +8

A horse walks into a bar, the bartenders asks "Why the long face?"

thumb_up thumb_down +8

Jehovas Witnesses: Summer vacation edition reality show: BItch: Do you know Jesus? Guy: Goddammit you A*Beep*SSHOLES again! I keep telling you all this is m0thertrucking Spain, I know like 500 Jesus`s living in this town alone! *slams door* Moral: Everybody knows at least something about the goddamn Jesus! Ill try asking "Is he the guy that lives downstairs?" Next time and see what happens.

thumb_up thumb_down +8

What did the spider say to the lobster? Nothing, they are enemies and don't live in the same habitat.

thumb_up thumb_down +8

If you have ten apples, and I take away three, then you will only have seven apples left, because ten minus three is seven. On the other hand, if I have a hundred apples, and you take away ninety-six, then I will call the police on you because that is stealing and it is not allowed. I will also remove you from my friends list on Facebook because stealing isn't nice.

thumb_up thumb_down +8

Holy shit Lawman! Next thing we know Nero comes back from the death! Seriously get over here stat and get "my men" under control here! So that last damn Moral was for you! I never understood why he picked me, so he never picked me at all... Man am I relieved! Do you ever fucking get tired of playing the hero? I basically ended up declaring war on Nero`s on people here, what should I do?

thumb_up thumb_down +8

I like my women how i like my coffee. Without a penis.

thumb_up thumb_down +8

why did victor sell half of club getaway because he wants a partner why did david buy the half because victors dying

thumb_up thumb_down +8

Whats from Hattersley? Someone who lives in Hattersley.

thumb_up thumb_down +8

Hello! I am Harry Potter, and i will be teaching you pottery today! Yes, call me Mr. Pottery!

thumb_up thumb_down +8

What's louder than a cat stuck in a tree? A foghorn.

thumb_up thumb_down +8

how many shit jokes do you need to make before you realize that random does not equal funny? An egg.

thumb_up thumb_down +8

Knock knock. Who's there? I am. I am who? I am pregnant.

thumb_up thumb_down +8

why did Kanye interrupt Taylor Swift at the VMA's? because he had a little too much scotch before the ceremony

thumb_up thumb_down +8

I had 99 problems Solved them all

thumb_up thumb_down +8

A paralyzed person walks into a bar.

thumb_up thumb_down +8

Two Chav's jump off a cliff who wins? Neither, the affects of gravity are equal despite the weight of said object.

thumb_up thumb_down +8

Q. What do you call a headless boy in a river A. A headless boy, in a river.

thumb_up thumb_down +8

Jack and Jill went up the hill. But it was winter and they froze to death

thumb_up thumb_down +8

Your momma is so fat that she could benefit from loosing a couple of pounds.

thumb_up thumb_down +8

What's black and white and red all over? A black, white, and red shirt.

thumb_up thumb_down +8

Why was a white man surrounded by black men crying? He was in a support group for black men with vitiligo, which destroys skin pigments.

thumb_up thumb_down +8

Why did the chicken cross the road? Because it was simply wandering around and happened to walk from one side of the road to the other.

thumb_up thumb_down +8

A black man walks into a KFC, he then realizes that he is in the wrong store, and walks out.

thumb_up thumb_down +8

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...


Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops