Two babies are playing in a sand box.. They both start crying because they get sand in their eyes

Did you hear about the man hear about the man who lost an arm and a leg in a car accident? He's alright now.

When did the laughter finally die? When you started this joke.

Q.How Do You Make 7 People Laugh? A.Tell Them a Good Joke.

A black man walks into a bar. The bartender say, "Sorry, we don't serve your kind here." The man continues to order a drink when he realises the comment was directed at the elephant standind behind him.

What's the difference between a Chinese guy and a bucket of fried chicken? There are numerous differences.

Knock knock. Whose there? No one, I'm trying to tell a knock knock joke.

Why did the blonde ask her doctor if she could get a new butt? She is insecure about its appearance and believes reconstructive anus surgery is the only solution.

XD, You must really like me Nero, do you think people have problems telling us apart here?

Why did the chair fall off the cliff? Well it is an inamitate object so it did not move itself, someone must have threw it

What did the doctor say to the lawyer? Nothing. They weren't even together. He was in the hospital saving people and the lawyer was in his office working on a case.

Why would Bill Clinton like Jess so much? Cause he has a vagina, smells like shit, and has cankles.

Why did the black man get a welfare check? Because he was either unemployed and decided he wanted someone to keep feeding his family, or decided to push forth the unfortunate stereotype of African-Americans not wanting to work and being lazy. Or maybe he didn't, why don't you ask him?

What did the fish want to drink? Charlie Brown

What do you call a fat zombie? Dead

I like my coffee like my women, without a penis

What happens if you don't stop, drop, and roll? Astigmatism.

"Knock Knock" "Who's there?" "Knock Knock Knock" "Knock knock Knock who?" "Just let me in, you twat, it's freezing out here!"

why did the kid sit alone at lunch? he had no friends

What do you call a black man that steals a VCR? My Grandpa, he was a Vietnam vet

What's worse than finding a worm in your apple? Finding an apple-sized tumor in your colon.

So A duck wants to be a musician. Day1: He cuts of his beak attempting to sing. Day2: Dead

Why was six afraid of seven? Because seven is a serial rapist and has been harrassing six for months.

Rose are brown, Violets are brown, Who keeps pooping in my garden?

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...