Why did the chicken cross the road? He was a recovering alcoholic who recently relapsed and drove his car through his garage. He took his anger out on his wife and kids. His wife kicked him out and filed for divorce. Conveniently, the liquor store is across the street.

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Nothing exceedingly odd happened at a bar

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What's worse then falling off a buliding? Falling of a higher building.

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What's worse than finding a knife in your car? Finding a car in your knife.

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Is it closer to Minneapolis, or by bus?

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I'm a wise old man, so I'm aloud to touch you in the bathing suit area.

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Q: Why did the plane crash? A: Someone threw a hippo at the pilot.

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how did the bus fall outa the tree it got hit by a hellicopter how did the boy fall outa the tree he was attached to the bus how did the chicken fall outa the tree it fell off the branch

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Roses are read Vliolets are bloo I cant spell How about you

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What do you do when a red gorilla comes running at you with 7 dominoes in his hand Ask him to stop

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Why couldn't little Billy fall asleep. Because Billy didn't have any counting skills to be able to coins sheep

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I'm a burrito... With a big shirt.

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what do you call a chicken thats little? a chicken. I lied about the little part

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. . I am a whale

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What did the asshole say to his friend behind him? Fart

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What did you call something that is long, hard and full of seamen? A ship.

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What do you get when you cross a black guy and a keyboard? A black guy punctured by a keyboard

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You see the love of your life. You can't say anything. She walks toward you. You can't move. She sits on you. You can't do anything. She starts crapping on you. You realize your a toilet. -Adam Chebali

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What do you call Batman and Robin after they have been run over by a car? Dead.

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Why was rebecca crying? Because her mum had just died in a house fire!!!

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knock knock who's there? ketchup ketchup who? better catchup with me!

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Bob has 80 chocolate bars, he gives 5 to his uncle,10 to his mother and 8 to his freind. He then eats 40 chocolate bars. Q. How many chocolate bars has bob got left now? A. Bob has no chocolate bars left. Shortly after Bob ate 40 bars he was diagnosed with diabetes. He then died of a heart attack due to high cholesterol.

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old people are like slinkies...they arent really good for anything but brings a smile to ur face when they're pushed down the stairs...just think about it ;)

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Why did andy fall down Because his friend pushed him over

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...


Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops