How much weight can an ant carry up a mole hill? Ice cream has no bones.

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What is yellow, has wheels, and lies on its back? A school bus in a terrible accident.

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What do you tell your chicken when it is it's birthday. Nothing, because he wouldn't understand you.

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If you eat a brussel sprouts-and-ketchup sundae, your tastebuds will likely turn purple and move to France, where people don't eat brussel sprouts-and-ketchup sundaes.

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knock! knock! who's there? the police, your family died in a car crash!

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Two hunters are in the woods. One of them clutches his chest, falls to the ground, and loses consciousness. In a panic, the other hunter calls 911 and tells the operator that his friend might be dead of a heart attack. The operator says "Before we send a coroner instead of an ambulance, first make sure he's dead." The hunter says "Alright." There is a pause and then BLAM! "Okay," says the hunter, "now what?" The operator follows standard procedures to keep the hunter on the phone, lucid and calm. 45 minutes later, police reach the scene, arrest the hunter and begin a months-long investigation. Forensics determines that the dead hunter was likely alive prior to being shot in the face at point-blank range. The defendant is charged with first-degree murder and receives a 30-year sentence. On the 9th year of his sentence, he is stabbed in the chest 6 times by an initiate in a rival prison gang and dies the next day. He was 53.

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What is worst than a black guy hanging on a tree. A burnt black guy hanging on a tree

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Whats the differnce betwwen a Wheelbarrow and a sack of dead babies The wheelbarrow is not in my garage

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Stop driving smart cars you fags

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Q: Whats worse than being raped by a giant scorpion A: Getting raped by three giant scorpion's

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Why did the cop pull over the car full of black people? Because, they were going 65 in a 35 mile per hour speed limit zone, Which is against the law.

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How many feet are in a yard? It depends how many people are in the yard.

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Knock Knock. Who's there? You Know. You Know who?.......GOODBYE!

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Why did the monkey eat the banana? Because it was sexually confused

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Q: Why do Mexicans love rice and beans? A: Because it's fairly easy to grow in places with relatively low rainful and high temperatures like that in which they live in.

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Why did the child cry? His sister just left for college

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Q. Why did the chicken cross the road ? A. Because he had grown tired of living thus choosing to end his life.

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My Mom was strutting down the runway. Then she got trampled by a plane.

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yo momma is so fat that she contributes to americas obesity problem

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What do you call a fish with no eyes? Blind.

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Chuck Norris gets punched in the face.

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What's grey and can't fly? A parking lot.

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Have you heard the one about the Priest, the Pastor, and the Mail Man? -no, how's that go? Oh you haven't? That's too bad, it's really good.

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Whats the difference between right and left? I stabbed your mom with my left hand.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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