A dyslexic man sells his soul to Santa.

Why did the road cross the chicken? Because Einstein said so. According to Einstein's Theory of Special Relativity, if you and the chicken were to cross the road simultaneously, your perspective, relative to the chicken, would remain unchanged. Therefore, the road would appear to move underneath the chicken, which would seem to be performing some style of polka dance.

Whats tan and jumps higher than a frog? Mexicans..

Why do firemen wear red suspenders? To keep their pants up

One penguin says to another penguin, "It looks like you are wearing a tuxedo." The other penguin says, "Yea, I have to go to dinner party later."

So a baby seal walks into a club.

what do you call a black guy on steroids? a black guy on steroids

A rat scurries into a bar. Six days later, all of the people in that bar die of bubonic plague.

Haikus are easy They are simpler than you think Just don't run out of...

Why did the man cross the road? He was obviously trying to get to his work, however he realized he was jaywalking in front of a cop and had to pay a fine and ended up being late to work.

Why did the burglar rob the bank? because he needed money due to the economic decline.

What's brown and sticky? A stick.

What makes the world go round? Gravity.

why do women have small feet. so they can stand closer to the sink

Knock knock Who's there? Adolf Adolf who? Adolf Hitler. Are you a jew?

Three nuns were talking in the church. The first nun said, "I was looking in the Priest's desk and found a condom." The second nun said, "I saw also saw that condom, except I poked holes in it." The third nun promptly reported them to the Priest causing the first two nuns to lose thier jobs.

Roses are rde, violets are bule, I am dyslexic, how about you?

Whats black, white, and huge? The world if you are a dog.

Jess Burns

A man walks into a bar and only gets a glass of water due to the fact that he is a recovering alcoholic.

what are you eating under there? oh a sandwich, its actually really good.... want a bite? yea thanks! yum yum

womens rights

I once bought a pack of batteries but they weren't included.

Why did man push another man off of a building? Because he is a homocidal maniac and should be in federal prison

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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