I agree Nero, we agree there, but let me ask you, why did you have the deep desire to create such a society before? You managed to do so as a teen, you wanted to help others, you put them before yourself, you where far more loyal to them, than they ever where to you. What motivated you then to sacrifice so much, where is that strength today?

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jeffrey: Do you know what happened on the 5th of november? gerald: No jeffrey: I cant remember

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A penguin is driving through the desert when his car breaks down. He has it towed to a service station in the nearest town to be repaired. The mechanic tells him that it may be a while so he might want to take a stroll around town, find something to do for a while and check back a little later for an update. The penguin decides that as it is so hot in the desert town, and he is accustomed to a much cooler climate, he might enjoy a bit of ice cream. He walks to the local ice cream parlor, orders a large vanilla cone, and proceeds to devour the treat in a flash, covering himself in ice cream in the process. He has ice cream on his flippers, his face, and all down his stomach; he is virtually covered in the white, sticky goo. Upon returning to the service station to check in on the mechanic and his car, the mechanic say to him, "Well, it looks like the seal on your head gasket leaked, the transmission is shot, and you appear to be covered in ice cream." To which the penguin replies, "Yes, I have made quite the mess of myself. Today just isn't my day."

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There was once a boy named Aladin. He was very poor until he found a magic lamp. When he rubbed the lamp, a genie poped out of the lamp. He said... "I will grant you one wish, master" Aladin thought about this for a long time, until eventually he said... "I wish for all the chocolate in the world" "Very well, master" And the genie granted his wish and Aladin had all the chocolate in the world Unfortunately, because he ate so much chocolate, Aladin died of heart & liver failure

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Wihat's red, green, and goes 100 miles an hour? A frog in a blender!!!!!

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SKnock Knock. Whose there? Why don't you open the door and find out instead of questioning the millions of other people that knock on your door everyday?

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Q:What happens when you choke a smurf? A: Nothing because smurfs dont exist

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How did the marines cross the minefield safely at night? Under a full moon

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Would you like to go to my jinga party, if you do save the date 9/11?

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Why did the chicken cross the road? He didn't, he was hit by a car. I lied about him crossing the road.

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People shouldnt make fun of holocaust jokes..my grandpa died cause of it! he fell off the gaurd tower

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What did the farmer say when he found his tractor? "There's my tractor."

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What's worse than walking into a door by accident? Finding out that your mother molestors children.

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Why did the ground beef taste funny? Because little Timmy fell in the grinder.

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What do a purple cow and a red fire engine have in common? Both like eating pizza on Fridays, except for the red fire engine.

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why did the boring girl get ditched she was boring...

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What do you call a Fly with no wings? Dead.

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How many midgets does it take to change a light bulb? If you do the math, it's probably one.

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why did the students in 7/8 red try to commit suicide? they had miss harding as a teacher!

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A muslim walks onto a plane. He goes to 13C as that is his seat designated on his ticket.

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Everyone believes in something. If you believe "you'll have another drink," you may be an alcoholic.

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What does a squirrel get when it rains? It gets wet.

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One day I walked into my backyard I saw a squirrel Then I was like oh hey squirrel

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2 squirrels with 2 massive boners and 1 little boner.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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