Why did the koala fall out of the tree? Because it was dead. Why did the second koala fall out of the tree? Because it was stapled to the first koala. Why did the kangaroo die? Because two stapled koalas fell on its head.

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Why did the duck cross the road? Because he was tired of the publicity his friend, the chicken was getting for crossing the road that he wanted to do it himself. Halfway across the duck was wistfully hit by a car and sadly, his story is lesser known and 99% of the people in this world really don't care about him. Thumbs up if you're that 1% that shows sympathy toward the duck.

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Knock Knock Who's there? Your neighbor. My neighbor who? I told you already, it's pronounced "Wu" I'm very sorry Mr. Wu.

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What did the straw say to the other straw? We are both straws just kidding they cant talk

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What happens when a unicorn gets her period? You know it's a girl.

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Whats better than 7 babies tied to 1 tree 1 baby tied to 7 trees

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Knock knock. Who's there? Not your grandma! Cause she's dead! Come to the funeral

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a guy walkied into a bar... he really got hurt

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"hey do you know the date" "58"

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What do you call a red ballon? It depends on its color duh!

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what did the penguin use as a napkin? a napkin

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What did the wall say to the other wall? Nothing, walls are inanimate things therefore it cannot talk.

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what did the panda say to the poachers? please stop killing my family.

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A vulture gets on a transatlantic flight with a dead animal in each claw. The flight attendant stops him, and says "I'm sorry, sir, only one piece of carrion per passenger allowed"

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What's funny about a black person, a Jew, and a mexican's graves being side by side? Nothing.

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Who needs god when coffee is cheaper

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knock knock whos there? i dont know arent you supposed to get the door?

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What do you call a million pigs jumping out of an aircraft? Bacon.

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What do you get when you cross a rainbow with a unicorn, baby, helmet, a bag of sugar, some watermelons, and a jewish guy's hair? A rainbow unicorn baby helmet with a bag of sugar and some watermelons. and some jewish guy's hair.

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Hellen Kellers dad put a plunger in the toiler and left it there. Hellen Keller went to use the bathroom and.. moved the plunger so she could take a shit.

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How did Debbie get a black eye? Because her dad asked her to take off her pants and she refused so he beat her

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Roses are red, Violets are blue, Where is the bathroom, I need to go poo.

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What did the kid with turrets CHEESE! say to his mom.

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How do you get five black men in a car? You offer them a good deal, then show them the car fax.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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