A black man walks into a bar. The bartender asks him to leave.

thumb_up thumb_down +14

What word starts with N and ends with R that you never want to call a black person? Neighbor.

thumb_up thumb_down +14

What's the one thing America's got but the UK hasn't... School shootings

thumb_up thumb_down +14

So a blond, a brunette, a ninja, a pirate, a priest, a rabbi, a mathematician and an engineer all walk into a bar, and the bartender says, "What, is this some kind of joke?"

thumb_up thumb_down +14

Why didn't the chicken cross the road? Because the farmer caught it.

thumb_up thumb_down +14

Why did the KFC worker dislike his job? He was paid lower than minumum wage due to the plummeting economy.

thumb_up thumb_down +14

A duck walks into a bar and orders a drink. The bartender doesn't understand him because he doesn't speak duck and promptly calls animal control to have the duck removed.

thumb_up thumb_down +14

Did you hear about the guy that had his entire left side cut off? He's all right now. Dead but all right.

thumb_up thumb_down +14

what do you call an animal thats black and white and red all over? an elephant

thumb_up thumb_down +14

what's worse than jamming a finger in a door the holocaust what's worse than the holocaust jamming 2 fingers in a door

thumb_up thumb_down +14

Once upon a time there was a small poor boy in a small German village. Her was name Smalls. Later he found out that he had to go back to Virginia because of their family then she got milk and went to the play that night like he was planning, and it was probably a problem with the clutch or transmission. It was fine because Smalls was 64 years old.

thumb_up thumb_down +14

Who won the race between the turtle and the hare? Well, odds are the two creatures wouldn't race given that animals do not speak. However, if they were, the hare would most likely win a land race because of its powerful legs and agility. However, if the turtle happened to be a seaturtle and the race took place underwater, our dear little beloved turtle would win, having the advantage over the rabbit.

thumb_up thumb_down +14

How did the girl cross the road? -She didn't, she died because she was blind and didn't see the "don't walk" sign.

thumb_up thumb_down +14

Why did the clown go to jail? He murdered a thirteen-year-old girl.

thumb_up thumb_down +14

Today I wanted to make world peace.... So I killed everyone.

thumb_up thumb_down +14

Last Christmas, I gave you my heart, and the very next day, I died because I didn't have a heart.

thumb_up thumb_down +14

why aren't black people real? they are. just because they are less visible at night makes no difference.

thumb_up thumb_down +14

A blond was walking alone down a street one night. Then she was suddenly mugged and raped. She reported her attacker but he was never caught.

thumb_up thumb_down +14

knock knock who's there? Dave Dave who? Dave proceeds to break into tears as his grandmother's alzheimers has progressed to the point where she no longer remembers him.

thumb_up thumb_down +14

What's worse than finding a worm in your apple? The Holocaust. What's worse than the holocaust? Finding two worms in your apple.

thumb_up thumb_down +12

Kid- "Where do babies come from?" Mom- (commits suicide)

thumb_up thumb_down +12

Why is Stevie Wonder always so happy? Probably becuase he's a highly succesfull multi-million dollor recording artist with 26 grammys and 1 oscar

thumb_up thumb_down +12

A jewish man walks into a bar has a drink, then walks out of the bar.

thumb_up thumb_down +12

Q: why does the cat go out of the house by the window A: It doesn't the window is closed

thumb_up thumb_down +12

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...


Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops